Matt Shaw Presents Masters of Horror (2017)

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If some of the Datlow anthos of recent years put me off of much “mainstream” modern horror, this collection may have single handedly gotten me to throw in the towel on much of contemporary “extreme” and “underground” horror. 


3 • The Cyprus Shell • (1968) • short story by Brian Lumley
13 • Again • (1981) • short story by Ramsey Campbell
25 • Survival • short story by Sam West
43 • Mary • novelette by J. R. Park
65 • Doll Face • short story by Peter McKeirnon
77 • A Taste of Mercy • short story by Andrew Freudenberg
87 • Chocolate • short story by Mason Sabre
97 • The Contract • short story by Shaun Hutson
115 • Dead-Eyed Dick • short story by Anton Palmer
133 • Beast Mode • short story by Wrath James White
153 • Dewey Davenport • short story by Shane McKenzie
163 • Zolem • novelette by Tonia Brown
195 • The Pit 18 • short story by Graeme Reynolds
213 • Hippocampus • short story by Adam Nevill [as by Adam L. G. Nevill]
223 • You Can Go Now • short story by Gary McMahon
233 • Down There • novelette by Ryan Harding
255 • Letter from Hell • short story by Matt Shaw
263 • Eye for an Eye • short story by Matt Hickman
279 • Three Black Dogs • short story by Daniel Marc Chant
299 • Checkout • short story by Amy Cross
309 • Loco Parentis • short story by Kit Power
321 • In the Family • short story by Adam Millard
333 • The Priest Hole • short story by Guy N. Smith
341 • Just Breathe • short story by Jaime Johnesee
349 • Raintown Sam • short story by Craig Saunders
363 • The End Is Where You'll Find It • short story by Michael Bray
379 • Don't Make Fun of the Haunted House • short story by Jeff Strand
387 • Trust Issues • short story by Mark Cassell
399 • The Silent Invader • short story by Paul Flewitt
405 • The Clay Man • short story by Clare Riley Whitfield
413 • Animus • novelette by Jim Goforth
445 • The Deep-Sea Conch • (1971) • short story by Brian Lumley
455 • Afterword (Matt Shaw Presents Masters of Horror) • essay by Chris Hall

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The Cyprus Shell - Brian Lumley: Major Winslow writes to Colonel Glee apologizing for his indiscreet departure from the Colonel’s dinner party when the shellfish were served. He explains that he hasn’t been the same since his time in Cyprus, when Corporal Jobling became transfixed by an odd sea-snail, which had ghastly results.

Not a bad story, although a little slight; Lumley follows it up with a sequel at the end of this volume but I never made it there. Feels like something Junji Ito might have read before writing Uzumaki.

Again - Ramsey Campbell: Don’t go to the Wirral Way, but if you do, then stay on it. And if you can’t manage that then at least don’t help any odd old women who’ve locked themselves out of their bungalow. . .

Skipped this one since I’d just re-read it the week prior in Hot Blood. But it is a masterpiece.

Sadly it’s all downhill from here as far as I can tell…

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Survival - Sam West: Jon Oxley did quite well with his first book to date, a fictionalized memoir of his abusive upbringing. Now he's struggling to prove to himself that he has more in the tank, which is why he's trying to contribute to a themed anthology all centered around the word 'survival.' A trip to the pub doesn't help with his writer's block, or his headaches, and he's not thrilled when the landlord tells him to stop sniffing around nubile barmaid Alice Logan. 

Jon stops sniffing around, and goes for it. And, wouldn't you know it, inspiration strikes!


The big problem here is that this is very obviously two Richard Laymon stories glued together--the 'writer writing for a themed anthology is suffering writer's block but killing a woman may be just what he needs' is "Invitation to Murder," and the plot/alibi that Jon imagines--guy comes across bound, nude, tortured woman, frees her for a bit of fun himself, then gets waylaid when the killer returns--is the premise of "Saving Grace" (and maybe also "The Good Deed"?). But nowhere near as good. 


The idea underpinning the story--a man alternating between his 'normal' self and a maniacal killer--is clever (I think Split did the same thing), and the confusion and terror it creates in the victim is well done. Otherwise, this is just dreary & derivative 'chop up chicks' material.



Mary - J.R. Park: Very hard to describe this one. It seems to start off with a deranged killer priest, Father Farrington, having a run-in with a Jehovah's Witness. But then it goes into a series of switching viewpoints, 'hunt the MacGuffin' intrigue and a lot of graphic violence. 

There's something here, certainly, but it's hard to follow in the interlocking narrative manner. I'm of the belief that a story told in a gimmicky way should still be interesting if it were told normally (Quentin Tarantino's movies actually achieve this), and I don't think that would be the case here. 


At this point I was looking around at the much better horror anthologies (Silver Scream and both Books of the Dead on my shelves, not to mention Portrait of a Lady) staring judgmentally from my shelves, and I decided, perhaps prematurely, life was too short. So down the chute it went, but not before I skimmed a few more stories and confirmed that I had made the right decision.

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Letter From Hell - Matt Shaw: Elderly Laurence Tope reaches out with a letter to young Hayley's parents to put their mind at ease about their missing daughter. For example, they'll be relieved to learn she died a virgin. . .

Pretty vile, and not in a good way. This is just an updated version of the letter all-star sicko Albert Fish wrote to the parents of his victim Grace Budd. Except that letter and the things it described actually happened, so are immediately more horrifying than what Shaw is doing here, and makes it i) redundant and ii) an empty attempt to wallow in the most 'easy mode' shock imaginable. Beginning to remember why I felt justified in actually tossing this thing down the garbage chute (don't worry, it's print on demand! I'm engaging in cultural terrorism here!)


Loco Parentis - Kit Power: School caretaker Mr. Ross knows kids very well, and can tell when one of them's being abused. So when little Freddie shows the tell-tale signs, Ross and his trusty hammer forego 'mandatory reporting' and go nonce-hunting instead.

I've been curious about Kit Power for a while, and I still want to give him a chance, but this isn't very inspiring, except that it i) inspired me to actually go ahead with Operation Garbage Chute and ii) inspired me to go dig my copy of Peacable Kingdom out of storage so I can reread "Megan's Law."

Raintown Sam - Craig Saunders: Harold's Ford, AKA 'Raintown,' is a decrepit small town with a decrepit small pub with a decrepit barfly named Sam. Sam's got a story as to how he lost his teeth and arm, which involves a strange traveling circus and 'rain clowns.' 

There are two or three different stories here, all of them promising, but the tale makes no sense, and 'rain clowns' are something that might work for Campbell or Ligotti but don't here. Pity.


Animus - Jim Goforth: The tale of Augury Falls and its watering hole the Night Owl, which poisons the minds of the residents until it breaks out in an orgy of violence.

I'm a sucker for a The Fog/The Crazies/Crossed style 'everybody goes nuts' story, and there are a few good bits here, but this story is much too long, too preachy, and the gory bits are overwritten. Jim, Go forth and write no more!