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Post by dem bones on Mar 21, 2008 7:26:59 GMT
Like it says. It can be, say, your top ten horror stories with rats in 'em or your top ten seminal Eurovision Song contest moments, ghost stories, disaster movies, most irritating records, worst vampire novels, cockroaches in films .... get the picture? Yes we see! The 'Ten' isn't mandatory. It can be your top one or thirteen or 250 for all I care. Just so long as it's top!
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Post by carolinec on Mar 21, 2008 10:46:36 GMT
The 'Ten' isn't mandatory. It can be your top one or thirteen or 250 for all I care. Just so long as it's top! So I guess it could be "top ten worst" - ie. bottom ten?
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Post by dem bones on Mar 21, 2008 11:07:36 GMT
Top ten bottoms, bottom ten tops - whatever you like. I was gonna put an example but I couldn't think of one.
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Post by sean on Mar 21, 2008 11:20:35 GMT
Let's have a go at this...
Top ten horror novels (no particular order, though):
1. Our Lady of Darkness - Fritz Leiber 2. The Shining - Stephen King 3. Incarnate - Ramsey Campbell 4. Ghost Story - Peter Straub 5. The Haunting of Hill House - Shirley Jackson 6. The Dark - James Herbert 7. Dracula - Bram Stoker 8. American Psycho - Bret Easton Ellis 9. Frankenstein - Mary Shelley 10. I Am legend - Richard Matheson
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Post by dem bones on Mar 21, 2008 12:54:52 GMT
That's the idea! Seven vampire novels you approach at your own risk. Etienne Aubin - Dracula And The Virgins Of The Undead Upton Smyth - The Last Of The Vampires: A Tale Arabella Randolph - The Vampire Tapes Sydney Horler - The Curse Of Doone Ken Johnson - Zoltan, Hound Of Dracula David Dvorkin - Insatiable Valentina Cilescu - Kiss Of Death I was gonna add "the complete works of Anne Rice" but figured you're all smart enough to take that as a given. Needless to say, they are all extremely enjoyable in their own weird way (with the exception of the ghastly Rice woman and hubby Stan's infernal "poetry" interludes). Up until recently, I'd have had no hesitation in singling out Dracula And The Virgins Of The Undead as the very worst, but that was before I encountered Upton Smyth's truly execrable The Last Of The Vampires, first published - how? - in 1845 and revived - why? - by R. Reginald and Douglas Menville (eds.) in The Spectre Bridegroom And Other Horrors (Arno Press, 1976). "Now, upon the self same day, though at an earlier hour at that of which mention has been made in the foregoing part of this chapter, took place, also, another incident which, having a connection with it, will now be recorded." or, as a lesser literary talent might have put it, "Later ...." God knows, James Moffat/ 'Aubin' had his faults, but you don't even get multiple references to the merits of the incomparable Seagrams Hundred Pipers to relieve the tedium of this one. Horribly written throughout with an impossibly convoluted plot, having re-read this unbelievably boring piece of garbage three times I'm still none the wiser, but the gist runs something like this. The German Baron Von Oberfels sells his soul to the Devil in return for eternal youth. Under the terms of the bargain, he's obliged to sacrifice a young woman to his master once every ten years and now the time has come for him to lead another bride into perdition. Murder, child-abduction, incarceration, blackmail - all there, all potentially interesting themes in themselves, but for the first time ever I find myself in agreement with Montague Summers about something, namely "The chief, some critics might say the only, merit of this tale is its excessive rarity .... the only impression with which I am met is that Mr. Upton Smyth knew nothing whatsoever of what the word vampire connotates". The suicide of Gertrude Florr, a prisoner in Schloss Onberfels, is the single encouraging moment in the seventy-odd pages but, as the rest of the dramatis personae insist on seeing the thing through to the bitter end, it's of scant consolation. Needless to say, it's a must-have. As to The Curse Of Doone, wait until the startling revelation that it wasn't a vampire after all, but ......
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Post by troo on Mar 21, 2008 13:21:27 GMT
Let's see if I can do the top ten WORST roleplaying games ever...
10: The Shadow of Yesterday. 9: The Everlasting: Book of the Fantastical (in spite of the other three being awesome). 8: Hellsing d20. 7:Stuperpowers. 6: Time Lord. 5: Cyborg Commando. 4:Mage: The Awakening. I spit on the stupid Atlantean shite. 3: Racial Holy War. 2: The Shab-al-Hiri Roach. 1: F.A.T.A.L.
Why, yes. Yes I did just put nWoD Mage higher up the shitlist than Cyborg Commando. Because at least Cyborg Commando doesn't pretend to be mindblowingly awesome. Nor does it take the beaten and bloody corpse of a predecessor and piss all over it while it struggles to take its dying breath...
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Post by nightreader on Mar 21, 2008 14:12:58 GMT
Thought I'd have a stab at this... kind of cheated as it turned out to really be a Top 12... [glow=red,2,300]My Top Ten Horror Stories[/glow] (In no order at all...) 1. 'A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts' and 'Waiting For Trains' by Charles Birkin - I've paired these together because they both had a similar impact on me when I read them, they are both stories that linger in the mind for a long time after reading, very disturbing. Only just read 'Coconuts' (in the last week or so) so it's still quite fresh... 2. 'Red Rubber Gloves' by Christine Brook-Rose. The last couple of paragraphs are the shockers. Can be found in John Burke's 'Tales of Unease'. 3. 'Caterpillars' by E.F. Benson. The first Benson story I ever read... 4. 'Eric The Pie' by Graham Masterton. One of my favourite writers. I believe this story got banned from 'Frighteners' magazine... 5. 'The Magic Show' by Chris Miller. Chosen not because I liked it but because it genuinely disturbed me, surely the sign of a powerful story. It pushes the limits. Can be found in 'More Devil's Kisses' - Michel Parry. 6. 'Quitters Inc.' and 'Sneakers' by Stephen King. Recently I've grown bored of the massive King novels he produces now, but these two stories are gems I think. Can be found in 'Night Shift' and 'Nightmares & Dreamscapes' respectively. 7. 'Piece Meal' by Oscar Cook. The first Cook story I ever read, but it was a toss up between this and 'His Beautiful Hands'. 'Piece Meal' is in Pan 2. 8. 'The Thing In The Cellar' by David H. Keller. A nasty story that just nudges 'A Piece of Linoleum' out of the way... 9. 'The Mandarin's Canaries' by Robert Bloch. I just like this one, don't know why. I found it in the 'Horror 7' collection of Bloch stories. 10. 'Slime' by Joseph Payne Brennan. I liked the 50's creature feature style of this one, found in Pan 4.
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Post by jkdunham on Mar 21, 2008 15:52:30 GMT
Nor does it take the beaten and bloody corpse... and piss all over it while it struggles to take its dying breath... I don't know how they get away with it. When I did that, somebody called the police. Personally I didn't see any reason to get the police involved in what was, after all, a domestic incident. I tell you, it's one law for them...
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Post by Johnlprobert on Mar 21, 2008 18:19:08 GMT
Nightreader, whoever you may be, you have exemplary taste in short horror fiction. 'Coconuts' is one of my favourite Birkin's and that Bloch story is quite horrible. As I've said elsewhere, I'd gladly shell out for an Oscar Cook collection, and I can recommend Joseph Payne Brennan's 'Stories of Darkness & Dread' if you liked 'Slime'.
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Post by dem bones on Mar 21, 2008 18:54:48 GMT
Yep, brilliant selection, nighty! Anybody who received these in book form would be getting value for money - it's like a companion to Haining's collection of the "most shocking" horror stories, The Unspeakable People. It says much about the durability of the stories that the only one I need a refresher course on is Red Rubber Gloves. Mention of Stephen King's Sneakers has inspired me to root out examples of horror stories set in toilets! Can't really comment on Troo's top ten as I've no experience of role playing games though Racial Holy War sounds like it might have something to offend everyone.
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Post by Calenture on Mar 21, 2008 20:54:39 GMT
Mention of Stephen King's Sneakers has inspired me to root out examples of horror stories set in toilets! I can save you a lot of work. All the others were written by Des and Caroline - the inventor of this sub-genre being Des. P.S. I've just remembered that Ramsey Campbell made an entry in this field with The Winner (see Mammoth Book of Best New Writings in Horror 17.
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Post by troo on Mar 21, 2008 21:03:25 GMT
I don't know how they get away with it. When I did that, somebody called the police. Personally I didn't see any reason to get the police involved in what was, after all, a domestic incident. I tell you, it's one law for them... That's typical that is. Can't really comment on Troo's top ten as I've no experience of role playing games though Racial Holy War sounds like it might have something to offend everyone. Indeed that was its sole purpose in life. The system stank
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Post by carolinec on Mar 21, 2008 21:28:18 GMT
Mention of Stephen King's Sneakers has inspired me to root out examples of horror stories set in toilets! I can save you a lot of work. All the others were written by Des and Caroline - the inventor of this sub-genre being Des. P.S. I've just remembered that Ramsey Campbell made an entry in this field with The Winner (see Mammoth Book of Best New Writings in Horror 17. I've only writen the one! I don't think I quite warrant being mentioned alongside Des and Ramsey (not to mention Stephen King). They're the true masters of the art of toilet horror!
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Post by dem bones on Mar 21, 2008 22:11:26 GMT
John Skipp and Craig Spector contribute a genuine toilet of terror contender to Kathryn Kramer & Peter Pautz collection, The Architecture Of Fear. Gentlemen sees the liberal narrator fall foul of "The Mighty Asshole" in the saloon bogs and find out what it means "to be a man". I found it very disturbing, I don't mind telling you.
If i'm not very much mistaken, Ramsey Campbell's Watch The Birdie is another possibility?
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Post by Calenture on Mar 21, 2008 22:20:57 GMT
writen the one! I don't think I quite warrant being mentioned alongside Des and Ramsey (not to mention Stephen King). They're the true masters of the art of toilet horror! You haven't seen the drawing I've begun based on your story. I promise you, it'll make you a star!
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