Kit Duane- The Campfire Collection

[josecruz]

(Chronicle Books, 2003)

Gather up your graham crackers and marshmallows, kiddies! We’re about to engage in one of the oldest customs of the human race: telling spooky campfire stories! This anthology is unique in that it separates its stories by the regions in which they take place (Mountains, Beach, Forest, etc.), creating the feel that you’re hearing the best of the best from all four corners of the Earth. The gimmick is somewhat cute and the idea of an ultimate campfire storyteller companion sounds great, but that this book is not. There are some noteworthy tales to be read, for sure, but some are either lackluster in plot or atmosphere while others I could not even imagine reading aloud to my friends during an excursion into the wild. You’re better off with Alvin Schwartz’s “Scary Stories” trilogy, which is saying something. Don’t let this deter you though; if you’re looking for a few good stories to pass the time with, go ahead and give this one a look. I just wouldn’t start pitching up the tent and gathering wood if I were you though.

“ICE SCULPTURES” by DAVID B. SILVA
The Story: A writer and other artists are given a grant by the government to interpret the four seasons through their respective mediums on the precipitous Eagle Peak. One bohemian in particular, a hippie sculptor named Billy Dayton, captures the attention of the writer and his photographer friend Margo. But the two soon discover there is something sinister behind Dayton’s ice sculptures of his own likeness, each one transgressing into more horrible forms, when they find Billy’s melted remains in his tent. And there may be more pieces of art scattered across the mountain…

My Story: A very unique idea to say the least. This story can be classified under the “nature strikes back” sub-genre of horror. When the narrator speaks to us in the beginning, it sets us up for a dark punch line that we (at least I) didn’t see coming. At first you have some vague idea of what is going on with the sculptures, a type of Dorian Gray transformation into something horrible and decadent. But in this story it is much more literal; to say more would spoil the twist of the tale. It will eventually become more and more clear to the reader, like frost melting off a window, as it does to the narrator and they both will feel a chilling tingle scale up their spines at the final revelation.

“CREATURE OF THE SNOWS” by WILLIAM SAMBROT
The Story: Esteemed magazine photographer Ed McKale is sent on a special assignment by his boss to take part in an expedition to the Himalayan Mountains led by zoologist Dr. Schenk. Seems there have been some fuzzy photos taken of hairy, bipedal creatures roaming about the snowy plateaus and the publicity and scientific world are demanding a specimen. Heading up a mountain peak alone on the last day of their journey, Ed is astounded to see a family of the “Yeti” nearby and experiences the full breadth of the creatures’ existence…

My Story: When I finished reading this story, I sat in my bed for a few minutes and then, having thought it all over, finally exclaimed “What the hell was the point in all that?” The tale is simple, straightforward, and nothing new to anyone who has read this type of story or seen the Hammer film “The Abominable Snowman.” Guy goes into mountains to capture Yeti. Guy sees Yeti. Guy has close encounter with Yeti. Guy has a change of heart when he realizes, intuitively that is, that the creatures are more fantastic and profound than the human race gives them credit for and leaves them alone. Hoo-ray? Sure, that may sound like the premise of a promising story, but I think the problem lies in the writing. To me it just came off as detached, with no emotions or sympathy connected to it. Just the facts, ma’am. Unfortunately, this story left me colder than the Snowman’s toes. If you have the choice, skip this story and just tell yourself that you read it.

“XENOS BEACH” by GRAHAM JOYCE
The Story: After splitting up with his wife, a man is recommended by a friend to have a holiday in the beautiful country of Greece. Desiring to get away from all the tourism and commercialism, the man takes a bus ride to a desolate beach where only a crumbling church and several weather-ravaged tents remain. A few days later the man meets a family of fair-haired Greeks and is enchanted by the beautiful daughter. When the girl proposes an insane test of love to the man, he finds himself in over his head and on the road to something dark…

My Story: Hmmm… That’s all I can say when it comes to this story. I neither like it nor dislike it. There are elements that both entertained and bored me. The atmosphere itself seems to be a puzzle, a constant sense of mystery hanging in the salty air, leaving the reader in a state of uncertainty. In a way it seems to borrow from films like “Eraserhead”; things are seen or taken note of but not much explanation (or none at all) follows. This is not necessarily a bad thing. It leaves you wondering, pondering all the little hints and clues that Joyce leaves for you to percept. So, you may ask, what’s wrong with it? And my answer would be “I don’t know.” Maybe it’s too long? Predictable? Or is it that persistent feeling of uncertainty that’s getting my goat? I wish I could tell. Maybe that’s what Joyce’s motives were all along. To put you through the same sensations that the main character of the story goes through. Never knowing if what he does is right or wrong, if the world around him is hard reality or the mere fantasies of his overwrought mind. This story might not have even been in the book to begin with for all I know. In any case, I suggest you to read it and be the judge. I need an aspirin.

“DEATH TO THE EASTER BUNNY” by ALAN RYAN
The Story: A group of four friends from college decides to spend their vacation time in Deacons Kill, a town about four hours into the Catskill Mountains. Leaving their hotel and journeying into the dense forest, they are suddenly assaulted by an old hermit toting a rifle. In a weird trance, the teenagers go with the old man to his home and discuss many things with him, none of which they can remember later. They begin to make these trips frequently and soon the old man starts telling them of dark, perverse intruders invading the world. The legendary Easter Bunny is one such horrible creature, and as the holiday draws near the group prepares for the final showdown…

My Story: One of my favorite selections from the book. It is completely weird and perverse, much like how the old man describes all the “intruders” that he’s hunted down over the years. The idea is completely original and quite disturbing when you take the time to think of it. Imagine: you as a child (or even adult for that matter) walking down the dark corridors of your house in the early morning hours only to see (tad da!) the Easter Bunny in all his furry glory! Would your first reaction to this be walking up to it and petting it? I don’t think so. This story is shrouded in mystery and strangeness, but not in the migraine-inducing way that “Xenos Beach” was. The sequence where the group awaits the Bunny’s arrival in the forest was taut with suspense. And the actual Bunny itself? Creepy. Just creepy. If you want to end your night with a nice little shiver and a story that’ll make you run away screaming from Peter Cottontail, then this is the one for you, my friend.

[josecruz]

“WE HAVE ALWAYS LIVED IN THE FOREST” by NANCY HOLDER
The Story: An aging mother lives with her many children in the deep recesses of the forest, fearing of frightening creatures known as Them from the town. Her babies always try to escape but the mother is always able to bring them back to the den… and promptly devour them. When a sick little girl and her mother enter the cannibalistic crone’s home, the witch fears that they might endanger her little ones and bring the wrath of Them upon her family…

My Story: An alright little tale. The story kind of runs like a twisted fairy tale, with the typical archetypes of the wicked crone and the lost little girl (here, little girl and mother) in the woods. I remember when I first read this, I thought the twist of the story was going to be that the mother and her children would turn out to be a wolf mother and her cubs. Not that it would’ve been a good twist, but I was wrong any way. It’s a lot weirder than that. Not much else can be said for this story; it’s rather short and a quick little read. Enjoy it for its Grimm Brothers-trappings and call it a day.

“PROLOGUE: AS THE WOLF LOVES WINTER” by DAVID POYER
The Story: A man is hiking up a steep, forested mountain as the snow and cold pour mercilessly down from the heavens. Finding the ideal tree to place his radio on, he sets his spiked boots into the bark and makes his way up the tall cherry tree. Once his mission is completed he begins to head back down but notices a German Shepherd is sniffing through his backpack and parka. As the creature howls for his companions to join him, the man realizes that it is a hungry pack of wolves that are waiting for him to descend. Now the man must choose between death by winter’s icy grip or the jaws of the ravenous beasts below…

My Story: Don’t let the fact that this selection is the opening chapter to a full-length novel keep you from reading it. It is a darkly haunting and almost poetic (in its own right) piece that can stand alone as it does here. The “plot”, if that term is applicable here, is painfully simple and you will not be surprised by anything that happens. But all that is mere wolf-bait; it is the beautiful setting and atmosphere that Poyer creates through his words, almost like paintbrush strokes, that enchant you and keep your eyes glued to the page. There is something primal in all of us that responds to the image of a beast in the wild. The wolf is one such creature, running through the forest with its brothers and singing eerie songs in the night that make you think of love lost. Somewhat of a departure from the other stories in this collection, “As The Wolf Loves Winter” comes guaranteed to frighten you, as the first nightfall frightened the first man.

“CAUGHT IN THE JAWS OF DEATH” by JERRY MACDONALD
The Story: Matthias and Claudia are two German medical students who are enjoying a fun trip into the Canadian wilderness before Matthias begins training at a Seattle hospital. After they ride down the raging rapids, the two friends pitch a tent outside a cabin and call it a night. But the next morning brings anything but tranquility when a massive black bear suddenly attacks the couple, leaving Matthias on the very edge of life. Claudia must find help before her friend bleeds to death and the bear returns to finish the job…

My Story: This story bears the unique distinction of being the only selection from this collection that is actually based on true events. And no, I’m not trying to sell this story to you much like the film companies are currently doing with almost every horror movie that comes out. Originally published in Reader’s Digest, this story (article?) tells the harrowing tale of two people’s fight for survival against one of Mother Nature’s own children. While somewhat engaging, the fact that this is placed amongst a group of stories that are supposed to be read around a roaring campfire kind of… well, ruins it. If your kids ask you to tell them a scary story, do you immediately whip out the “Obituaries” section or a frightening column of “Dear Abby”? I didn’t think so. Kids don’t want to hear about that stuff, and neither do I when I delve into a book of this sort. I expect the reaction to a campfire horror story to be several fits of screaming, not “Oh, thank goodness they got him to the hospital in time.” Woops! Did I spoil the ending? Sorry. Maybe next time I’ll tell you what happens in the last panel of “Garfield.”

“SURVIVAL EXERCISE” by TALMAGE POWELL
The Story: James Kelley and two other members of the U. S. Marines are sent into the steamy wilderness of the Florida Everglades in order to endure a Survival Exercise. This task is found to be even harder than they first thought when a wailing, foul-smelling humanoid invades the camp one night, horribly slaughtering Kelley’s comrades. The creature spares Kelley’s life and he is able to elude the monster’s reaches by escaping into the swamp. Unable to radio for help, Kelley soon discovers that the creature’s desire for him is much more frightening than any thirst for blood…

My Story: James Bond Meets The Skunk Ape! Well, not exactly. The hero of this story is about 6’2” and weighing in around 210 pounds. And the monster is never called the Skunk Ape. Rather it’s given the ridiculous Native American name “Stuestaw Enawchee,” which translates to “too much body.” Yeah, don’t ask. But other than those two trivial matters, this story has all the fun and fast-paced action of a spy adventure. While he definitely isn’t a Joe R. Lansdale, Powell gives us a bare-chested, red-blooded story of a mad pursuit in a steaming swamp, the wits and survival tactics of Man vs. the ferocity and strength of Beast. This story would be much at home in an old time radio adventure show such as “Escape.” The ending reminded me of a twist similar to an episode from another radio show “Quiet, Please.” This story doesn’t try to pretend to be anything it isn’t; it is a simple action story with a few horror elements and a splash of the red stuff tossed in for good measure. Read this if you’re looking for some straightforward storytelling where your thinking skills will be kept to a minimum and your enjoyment factor will be pleasantly satiated.

[josecruz]

“SWAMP HORROR” by WILL SMITH and R. J. ROBBINS
The Story: A young man is given news that his father has been missing for almost a week and immediately rushes to the elder’s farm by the swamp. After discovering their family dog Wolf running frantically from the swamp and appearing to be completely emaciated, the young man is determined on finding the solution to the perplexing mystery. Entering Marvin’s Swamp and heading to the stagnant waters of Dead River, he finds the corpses of various animals littered about and a crawling, slithering horror that can freeze the blood in man’s veins…

My Story: I absolutely love the pulp magazines of the 30’s and 40’s, so it comes as little surprise that I enjoyed this story so much. Originally published in Weird Tales, this story is drenched with all the trappings and clichés of the time; a young and nameless protagonist with a die-hard curiosity, an eerie setting drenched in fog and with a past of mysterious happenings, a terrifying encounter with a monster that turns out to be the family dog (a precursor to the cat scares in today’s horror cinema?), and a sense of foreboding that hangs so heavy in the air that you can slice it with a machete. These stories usually were less concerned with plot and characters and spent all their attention on atmosphere and amplified the scenes of the grim and grotesque. The narrator’s description of Dead River gives you a real sense of just what an ugly place it is and the assault of the creatures responsible for all the death in the swamp may have you scratching your arms and checking under the bed for any creepy crawlies. A must-read for anyone who enjoys little pieces of depraved antiquity.

“THE VALLEY OF THE SPIDERS” by H. G. WELLS
The Story: A young virgin has just escaped the clutches of the master and now he and two of his servants chase after the feisty damsel on horseback. They enter a lonely valley that is deathly quiet and seemingly devoid of any life, save for the constant flutter of white flowers blowing in the wind. But the persistent trio discovers that the innocent-looking wisps are actually spider’s webs and soon are under siege by the bloodthirsty arachnids and, in the ensuing madness, the master’s true colors emerge…

“WAZIAH” by JOE R. LANSDALE
The Story: Trapper Roland McArthur is trudging through the freezing wind of a blizzard up the Black Hills of the Dakotas and is relieved to see a line shack in the distance. Peeking in through a chink in the wood, McArthur is taken aback when the business end of a rifle goes off in his face. Mostly stunned, he awakens inside the cabin and makes the acquaintance of the shooter, an old coot named Crawford, who says he was trying to keep the legendary Wooly-Bugger from breaking in. A Native American girl whom Crawford has named Snowflake is also holed up in the cabin along with her child. Turns out the old man isn’t as crazy as he sounds when the ferocious beast attacks the shack and drags the screaming Snowflake away. Realizing that the Wooly-Bugger has mated with Snowflake and produced the half-human baby, McArthur and Crawford head out to stop the monster in its wake…

“THE SPECTRE BRIDE” by ANONYMOUS
The Story: During a magnificently beautiful and white winter evening in Sault Ste. Marie, Ralph Hagadorn is trekking down the snowy roads to arrive at a friend’s house the next morning to act as the groomsman in his wedding. Enchanted by the freezing ice, Ralph is impelled to take out his skates and travel down the frozen river. As the infatuated young man skates along, his frost blurred eyes are shocked to see a mysterious skater in flowing white garments just ahead of him. Before the evening is over, Ralph will realize that he has been watched over by a mysterious guardian who has saved him from the icy clutches of Death…

[josecruz]

“BLOODY POLLY” by MICHAEL NORMAN and BETH SCOTT
The Story: Polly Brown and her family have just moved into the Kentucky wilderness in 1815 and her father soon turns their cabin into a thriving plantation. When Polly becomes engaged to prospective merchant Harry Geiss, all seems right with the world. That is until Harry turns his attentions to Polly’s beautiful younger sister Frances Clara. Enraged at her sibling, Polly takes Frances out for a walk in the woods only to brutally murder her with an axe. Thinking that she has gotten away with murder, the devious Polly’s plans soon begin to crumble as evidence of the murder begins to rise to the surface and her sister starts to call from the grave…

“THE FACELESS THING” by EDWARD D. HOCH
The Story: Buddy is a very old man who returns to the farmhouse of his youth as his memories of the past beckon to him in his autumn years. Despite fond childhood memories, one event in particular has called Buddy back to his home in order to confront it once and for all. When he was around the age of ten, Buddy and his sister journeyed to a small stream on the land that cut into the side of a hill via a tunnel. As the two siblings journeyed into the wet darkness, Buddy’s sister frantically called out his name. The boy was terrified to witness a hairy, ooze-covered abomination reach forth from the darkness and take his sister. Having finally returned after all these years, Buddy goes to lay his demons to rest…

“ALLAL” by PAUL BOWLES
The Story: A fourteen year old girl gives birth to a boy at the hotel where she works and names her son Allal. She soon abandons the child and Allal is left to perform manual labor at the hotel for most of his life. Moving into the city when he becomes older, Allal comes into contact with an old man who sells snakes for a living. He tells the boy that it is possible to train the serpents to do as he wishes so, while the old man sleeps, Allal steals a scarlet snake from his collection. Soon Allal is able to command the snake to move at his whim; but the true journey begins when Allal transcends the mental connection he has with his pet and sees through the eyes of the reptile…

“THE QUEST FOR BLANK CLAVERINGI” by PATRICIA HIGHSMITH
The Story: Avery Clavering is a professor of zoology at a California university who becomes intrigued by the tales of giant, man-eating snails who inhabit the island of Kuwa. His scientific interest piqued and possessing an immense desire to have his name go down in biology history, Clavering travels to the lonely island to stake his claim. But the portly scientist finds he is in great danger when the crafty mollusks leave him stranded on the island and at their slimy mercy unless he can fight back for his life…

[dem bones]

i'd never heard of Ghosts, Beasts & Things That Go Bump ..." until you posted this, but on the strength of the stories i've read elsewhere - Swamp Horror, Ice Sculptures, The Quest For Blank Claverengi, The Faceless Thing, Creature Of The Snows and Valley Of The Spiders - it doesn't look like a bad collection at all. i'd agree that Swamp Horror is a highlight: the early Weird Tales pioneers didn't mess about with subtlety or any of that nonsense. The discovery of the corpses and the disgusting things that made them that way is both horrible and laugh out loud funny at the same time. The Quest For Blank Claverengi is one of the finest ever horror stories to feature a snail on the rampage and inspired one of my all time favourite cover photo's, 6th Fontana Book Of Great Horror Stories.

[josecruz]

Ha ha! That's an amazing cover, demonik! Nothing like pure pulpy goodness to brighten one's day.