Dave Brzeski (ed.) - Shadmocks and Shivers

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Also in the works from the mighty Shadow Publishing

Dave Brzeski (ed.) - Shadmocks and Shivers: New tales inspired by the stories of R. Chetwynd-Hayes

Jim Pitts

Blurb:
Ronald Chetwynd-Hayes, England's very own 'Prince of Chill', would have been 100 years old in 2019.



To celebrate this, fifteen of the finest authors currently working in the supernatural genre have come together to contribute new tales of The Monster Club, Clavering Grange, Temptations Unlimited, Madam Orloff, Vampires, Ghosts and of course Shadmocks.

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The anthology is edited by Dave Brzeski and will consist of new stories based on the themes and characters created by Chetwynd-Hayes. The book will feature 15 yarns by Tina Rath, Adrian Cole, John Llewellyn Probert, Stephen Laws and others, including Ron himself. Plus a feature by Robert Pohle on Chetwynd-Hayes' The Fontana Book of Great Ghost Stories. Cover artist is the fantastic Jim Pitts.

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Just arrived - here's the TOC.

Dave Brzeski [ed] - Shadmocks and Shivers: New Tales Inspired by the Stories of R. Chetwynd-Hayes (Shadow Publishing, Oct. 2019)

Jim Pitts

Dave Brzeski - Foreword

Cardinal Cox - Monster Rights
R. Chetwynd-Hayes - The Gibbering Ghoul of Gomershal
Tina Rath - An Episode in the Life
Simon Clark - Murder Machines
Adrian Cole - Shadmocks only Whistle
Marion Pitman - A Day with the Professor
John Llewellyn Probert - Madame Orloff's Last Stand
Fred Adams, jnr. - Family Plot
Josh Reynolds - The Creeping Crawlers of Clavering
I. A. Watson - Mr. Begot's Bespoke Mantles
William Meikle - Temptations Unlimited
Theresa Derwin - Single and Sparkly Dot Com
Pauline Dungate - Fetch!
John Linwood Grant - Marjorie Learns to Fly
Stephen Laws - Fire Damage

Robert Pohle - My Necromance with Chetwynd-Hayes's Fontana Book of Great Ghost Stories
Contributors

Blurb
Stories inspired by "The Prince of Chill"
Ronald Chetwynd-Hayes, England's very own Prince of Chill would have been 100 years old in 2019.
To celebrate this, 15 of the finest authors in the supernatural genre have come together to pen new tiles of 'The Monster Club', 'Clavering Grange', 'Temptations Unlimited,' 'Madame Orloff', Vampires, Ghosts and, of course, Shadmocks!

Very well done to all involved and many thanks to David A. Sutton. As mentioned, I'm looking forward to getting stuck into this one!

Available for order from:

Shadow Publishing

Am*z*n.co.uk

Amazon

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"Sweetheart, it's been a long time since you sat on top of me. Now ... let's go for a ride."

Cardinal Cox - Monster Rights: Verse. The massed ranks of the ghastly outline their demands.

R. Chetwynd-Hayes - The Gibbering Ghoul of Gomershal: (The Fantastic World of Kamtellar, 1980). We learn in the preface that, due to sporadic interest from various film companies, the Chetywnd-Hayes estate are protective of his characters, Francis St. Clare and Frederica Masters. Consequently, Mr. Brzeski was prohibited from including any bizarre new stories featuring the psychic detective and his glam rock partner, something which might be seen as a mercy by certain readers. However, to make up for any disappointment, they've kindly allowed Dave to resurrect this early adventure.

It is the Haines family's misfortune that their new home, Woodbine Cottage, stands next door to the Gomershal burial ground, home to a sleeping, lard-white corpse-eater. Reginald Haines insistence on treating the disused graveyard as his personal landfill site stirs the creature, which takes to salivating at his family through the kitchen window.

As Francis & Fred novellas go, Gibbering Ghoul is on a par with the rest of a series which tends to divide opinion among fans. If this is your first RCH story, it's possible you might be left wondering what all the fuss is about.

Tina Rath - An Episode in the Life: Mood piece concerning young Ronald's pre-war stint as an extra on "the school film" (presumably Goodbye Mr. Chips). here we find him snooping around the sets, determined to catch a glimpse of a reputedly hideous werewolf, star of the forthcoming horror feature. Ron climbs the hanging tree for a view of the men's dressing rooms. He's in luck. There's someone sat at dressing table taking off his face ....

Simon Clark - Murder Machines: Personal favourite to date. Beautiful gold-digger Rachel Tilainey murdered husband Bernie by stretching a wire across the road, neatly severing him as he sped by on his motorbike. Ten months on, she's planning an equally macabre fate for latest lover, Jason Telford.

Between lovemaking sessions, Jason is obsessed with repairing Bernie's monster lawnmower, The Sprottforth Fearless, which is handy for Rachel, as, now she's forged his will, it's time for mister extreme moneybags to suffer a deliciously gory fatal "accident."

But ... the cottage stands on the edge of Muddleback Forest, "Magick in every grain of the soil," and Rachel is soon made uncomfortably aware of a motorbike circling the property at all hours. The constant drone gets on her nerves so that she just has to go reprimand the rider.

Hint of misogyny, an impossibly beautiful mistress of villainy horribly punished, and two uniquely fantastical monsters. You really can't get much more R.C.H. than that.

TBC ...

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Adrian Cole - Shadmocks Only Whistle: When their child is born, Monster Club regulars Nigel and Drusilla Portly-Belgrave turn theirs back on the old crowd, determined that daughter will grow up to leads as "normal" a life as her condition will allow. For Lucinda is a Shadmock, and we all know what they are capable of once aroused to anger.

Problems arise when Lucinda hits seventeen. Nigel has already arranged for her to marry an Earl when he's visited by Vladimir Kazar, big knob vampire, who demands he introduce Lucinda to the club within three days. When Nigel refuses, the house comes under siege from the combined forces of Kazar's vampire cronies, the Pack, and various misshapen elementals. If ever Lucinda is to accomplish that first devastating whistle, now would be as perfect a time as any.

Marion Pitman - A Day with the Professor: Unscrupulous muckraker Meritt arranges an interview with Professor Stavanger, alleged vivisectionist and genetic engineer who is rumoured to be creating monsters at his Kent retreat. Much to Meritt's crushing disappointment, his host's demeanour is so non-mad there ought to be a law against it - all that scheming in vain! But wait til Stavanger gives him a guided tour of his other laboratories.

John Llewellyn Probert - Madame Orloff's Last Stand: The residents of Happylands Home for Sociable Seniors come under attack from the ghosts of their pets. Only one reformed phony medium knows what they're up against but does she still have it in her to overcome an old adversary? To say any more would ruin it. Will just mention that story is up there sharing the #1 spot with Murder Machines.

A hundred pages in and it must be said that, while the styles might be different, each of the authors have, in their own way, got RCH off to a tee.

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A little out of sequence but never mind.

Fred Adams, jnr. - Family Plot: If RCH wrote an EC Comic strip. Each night Chester Hastings, bookkeeper, visits the family plot in St. Marks cemetery to keep his nearest and dearest informed of the day's events. Birthday girl Aunt Tillie notices he's down in the dumps, and Chester confides that he detests working for Elias Canty, brutal money-lender. The Hastings' put their skulls together, set an irresistible bait to lure Canty to destruction.

William Meikle - Temptations Unlimited: If RCH was a closet James Manfred, OBE. George Jenkins is a connoisseur of erotic books and videos, "the real stuff. Scandinavian." A tip off from a fellow enthusiast leads him to Temptations Unlimited in Lewisham. Sure enough, the shop caters for the most way out of way out monster kinks and perversions, but, dear me, the prices are upwards of exorbitant! George slips a video inside his coat while the affable old proprietor is out of sight.

Back home in North Finchley, George and purloined tape nip out to the garden shed which doubles as his private XXX cinema. Door locked, blinds down he slots Snow White and the Seven Weregoblins in the TV/VHS combo player, and ....

Theresa Derwin - Single and Sparkly Dot Com: If RCH was tech savvy. An on-line dating agency targeting 'lonely Goths and weirdos' was always going to attract a nutter or several, but this Count Lachlan Suc-Cour character is getting right on Penny Jones's nerves. Doesn't he realise that wannabe vampires went out with the Millennium bug? Meanwhile Shona, Penny's best friend an co-partner, is hounded by stalker unknown, chief suspect, an ultra-possessive ex-boyfriend. The Dracula tribute act volunteers his assistance.

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Josh Reynolds - The Creeping Crawlers of Clavering: "Clavering is one of the most infamous haunted houses in Britain. Though not as well-known as Borley Rectory and Berkley Square, it surpasses both in sheer nastiness." So speaks Charles St. Cyprian, the Royal Occultist, as he and "assistant mine" Miss Ebe Gallowglass - the Francis and Frederica of the Roaring Twenties - prepare to do battle with the multiple entities infesting the billiards room. Present owner Oscar 'Tipsy' Sinclair originally hired St. Cyprian's pal, Philip Wendy-Smythe, to banish the evil phenomena but little surprise a haunting on this epic scale proved too great for him to tackle.

I. A. Watson - Mr. Begot's Bespoke Mantles: White Grunge-hop Rapper Stabby B and posse invade an exclusive gentlemen's tailor on Oxford Street where, word of mouth has it, "you can become the monster of your choice." Stabby's current squeeze, Diamante Sparkle, intimately knows of one satisfied customer, although, as the proprietor patiently explains, the client in question, Quentin MacDocherty, Laird of Dunbeggat, is of Red Cap-Kelpie parentage and therefore, suitable for their services. All Mr. Begot's Bespoke Mantles can do is customise the kind of monster one already is. Only in the very rarest circumstances will they upgrade a human.

Fortunately, in Stabby D.'s case, it's fair to say the raw materials are in place to perform his desired custom job, namely to become something indestructible, bad ass and blessed with a massive appendage. Well, Mr. Stabby, we think we can oblige. If you'd like to step this way ...

If the stories commented upon to date can be said to share one thing in common it's that they've all adopted RCH's chills-and-chuckles approach. There's been nothing as melancholy as, say, An Act of Kindness, The Ghost Who Limped or The Death Of Me. That said, there's not been one story I disliked, which is rarely the case with his own collections.

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Pauline E. Dungate - Fetch!: Twelve-year-old Minette Armstrong befriends a ghost in the church next door unaware that the shade is that of her father, Matthew Kittering, who died shortly before she was born. Killery is lonely now the vicar keeps the doors shut during the week and takes advantage of his annual night of freedom, Halloween, to steal Minette's essence and send a fetch to replace her at home so her mother won't realise she's gone.

The spirit of Minette pours out her troubles to a sympathetic security guard - and his doggie - at the Monster Club. Jack promises to reunite the little girl with her body and have a quiet word with errant phantom dad.

John Linwood Grant - Marjorie Learns to Fly: Kenneth and Marjorie Eden are recently moved to Ressington from Northampton and have already learned that it is the most boring place in the country. So boring, in fact, that four regulars at the drab King's Head pub, whose primary interests include knitting, spicy dishes, violence and abandoned sex with the postman, have taken to invading the minds of selected neighbours and having them perform certain .... tasks. Marjorie is among their victims, until she turns the tables.

Stephen Laws - Fire Damage: "A club for fancy dress parties. Yes - that's right. It comes back to me now. The club had a 'horror' theme. Hosting parties for those who liked to dress up as vampires and monsters, as I recall."

Perfect choice as closing story, in fact, it would work as an epilogue to The Monster Club itself, book and film. A year to the day of a fatal fire at a basement club in London's Swallow Street, an elderly R. Chetwynd-Hayes pays a visit to the site accompanied by something which resembles a hound. He next calls at the office of Pearce Insurance to press his clients' claim for substantial financial reimbursement. The Managing Director is in uncooperative mood but, unfortunately for him, anticipating resistance, the author has brought along six dear old friends for moral support.

Last but not least, an essay. Robert Pohle – My Necromance with Chetwynd-Hayes’s Fontana Book of Great Ghost Stories: Nostalgia trip liberally laced with quotes from Chetwynd-Hayes' introductions to Vols 9-20. "As Aickman had done, Chetwynd-Hayes made of the series something special. These are not just collections of short stories by myriad authors, but in a tangible way they are personal utterances of the editor."

Personal stand-outs for this reader are Murder Machines, Madame Orloff’s Last Stand (age becomes her: the Clapham elemental-buster is on the best form of her life), Mr. Begot's Bespoke Mantles and Fire Damage, though, as mentioned, each story brings plenty to the party. Bizarre and charming at turns, Shadmocks and Shudders is a joyful tribute to, and celebration of, the macabre, absurd and strangely strange world of R. Chetwynd-Hayes.