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Post by marksamuels on Jun 17, 2010 0:47:57 GMT
Dem I've got a funny feeling the next match up, Argentina vs South Korea, could get a bit tasty. El Diego's Locos vs the Masters of Taekwondo... Mark S.
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Post by dem bones on Jun 17, 2010 18:10:25 GMT
Football's Shame: The Battle Of The San Siro, 1990 Stick that up your Junta, Argie! A competitive Cameroon side bundled home a flukey goal and then set about containing the world champions with a winning combination of brutal fouls and time-wasting. Although eventually reduced to nine men, the Cameroonians held out for a famous shock victory. Germany versus England? No. Benjamin Massing's scything lunge on the ultra skillful Claudio Caniggia was the highlight of Italia 1990 It's livened up a bit now. Argentina looking the part, and, dear Good, Uruguay playing attacking football! Glad to see the Super Eagle's Kalu Oche entering into the spirit of things, earning himself a truly pointless sending off with his kick at Greece's Torosidis whose shameless over-reaction was equally commendable. We had quite a watchable match afterward! i'm still going for Ivory Coast or Portugal to thug out.
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Post by Craig Herbertson on Jun 17, 2010 20:25:43 GMT
Mexican waves all round
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Post by marksamuels on Jun 17, 2010 22:44:19 GMT
Football's Shame: The "Real" World Cup Final 1934 (The Battle of Highbury) England withdrew from FIFA in 1928, two years before the first World Cup, because they couldn't be bothered sending players on weeks' long journeys half-way around the globe and having to fork out for their wages. Better instead to knock around at home with the mighty teams of Scotland, Wales and Ireland. The rest of the planet was a bit miffed at this isolationism, and while all three of the first so-called World Cup tournaments were ignored by England in favour of cricket (our summer game), Johnny Foreigner kept insisting their strange new tournament was the true test of greatness. The dispute was finally resolved in 1934, when World champions Italy came to London with instructions from Il Duce himself, the fascist dictator Mussolini, to crush, at all costs, the English at football. He promised each and every player a luxury motorcar and huge riches as a reward should they succeed. They were managed by master-tactician, Vittorio Pozzo, still the only coach to have won consecutive world cups. His team of world-beaters had been honed into an irresistable football force. Meanwhile, England's team was chosen by a bunch of blazer-suited duffers collectively called "The FA selection committee". This august body of old farts decided it was all a bit of a laugh and picked players who had less than ten caps for their country. Since the match was at Arsenal, they picked seven of the team from that club. Rain and fog descended on Highbury Stadium before kick-off and World War Two was about to begin four years early ... Within the first minute centre-forward Ted Drake was cynically brought down by goalie Carlos Ceresoli. PENALTY! Drake's fellow striker, Eric Brook, stepped up to take the spot kick: but missed. After two minutes Drake went in with a hard side tackle and, accidentally, he said, broke centre-back Luis Monti's foot. The Italian limped off, and, with no substitutes in those days, the Italians were down to 10 men for the rest of the match. The Azurri went berserk and retaliated with extreme force. England captain and full-back Eddie Hapgood had his nose broken by an forearm smash. He was off the field for 15 minutes while the physios attempted to stem the flow of gore from the bloody mess that had once been his nose. Ted Drake was punched in the face repeatedly and sported two black eyes by the end, Ray Bowden had his ankle damaged and Eric Brook suffered a broken arm. The great Sir Stanley Matthews, the wizard of the dribble, was hacked down the minute the ball reached his feet. Despite this, Brook scored with a header and then put away a free kick. Drake then hammered the ball into the back of the net to put England 3-0 up at half-time. In the second half, the Azurri produced a scintillating display of attacking football. Italian legend Giuseppe Meazza, still considered the greatest Azurri forward of all time, scored twice, and then hit the post. Only the ferocious tackling of man of the match performance from Wilf "hardman" Copping in midfield and the acrobatic heroics of goalkeeper Frank "The Cat" Moss ensured that England emerged victorious from what Sir Stanley Matthews described as the most violent game he had ever played in during his long 33 year playing career... Mark S.
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Post by dem bones on Jun 18, 2010 8:25:18 GMT
image borrowed from the Skipper's mighty Blakiana site. see the original in its full majesty HERE. Thanks Mark, that was a treat! incidentally, while by no stretch of the imagination is it a horror story, if you've not done so already treat yourself to the Wordsworth Casebook Of Sexton Blake if only for W. J. Lomax's joyous novella A Football Mystery. Sexton Blake captains England against the Crimson ramblers (an all-conquering team of cheating Johnny Foreigners) in what came to be known as "The Greatest Game Of Football That Was Ever Played."
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Post by Craig Herbertson on Jun 18, 2010 10:10:46 GMT
Football's Shame: The "Real" World Cup Final 1938 (The Battle of Highbury) England withdrew from FIFA in 1928, two years before the first World Cup, because they couldn't be bothered sending players on weeks' long journeys half-way around the globe and having to fork out for their wages. Better instead to knock around at home with the mighty teams of Scotland, Wales and Ireland. The rest of the planet was a bit miffed at this isolationism, and while all three of the first so-called World Cup tournaments were ignored by England in favour of cricket (our summer game), Johnny Foreigner kept insisting their strange new tournament was the true test of greatness. The dispute was finally resolved in 1938, when two-times World champions Italy came to London with instructions from Il Duce himself, the fascist dictator Mussolini, to crush, at all costs, the English at football. He promised each and every player a luxury motorcar and huge riches as a reward should they succeed. They were managed by master-tactician, Vittorio Pozzo, still the only coach to have won consecutive world cups. His team of world-beaters had been honed into an irresistable football force. Meanwhile, England's team was chosen by a bunch of blazer-suited duffers collectively called "The FA selection committee". This august body of old farts decided it was all a bit of a laugh and picked players who had less than ten caps for their country. Since the match was at Arsenal, they picked seven of the team from that club. Rain and fog descended on Highbury Stadium before kick-off and World War Two was about to begin a year early ... Within the first minute centre-forward Ted Drake was cynically brought down by goalie Carlos Ceresoli. PENALTY! Drake's fellow striker, Eric Brook, stepped up to take the spot kick: but missed. After two minutes Drake went in with a hard side tackle and, accidentally, he said, broke centre-back Luis Monti's foot. The Italian limped off, and, with no substitutes in those days, the Italians were down to 10 men for the rest of the match. The Azurri went berserk and retaliated with extreme force. England captain and full-back Eddie Hapgood had his nose broken by an forearm smash. He was off the field for 15 minutes while the physios attempted to stem the flow of gore from the bloody mess that had once been his nose. Ted Drake was punched in the face repeatedly and sported two black eyes by the end, Ray Bowden had his ankle damaged and Eric Brook suffered a broken arm. The great Sir Stanley Matthews, the wizard of the dribble, was hacked down the minute the ball reached his feet. Despite this, Brook scored with a header and then put away a free kick. Drake then hammered the ball into the back of the net to put England 3-0 up at half-time. In the second half, the Azurri produced a scintillating display of attacking football. Italian legend Giuseppe Meazza, still considered the greatest Azurri forward of all time, scored twice, and then hit the post. Only the ferocious tackling of man of the match performance from Wilf "hardman" Copping in midfield and the acrobatic heroics of goalkeeper Frank "The Cat" Moss ensured that England emerged victorious from what Sir Stanley Matthews described as the most violent game he had ever played in during his long 33 year playing career... Mark S. Thank God they finished in time for tiffin or there might have been words.
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Post by dem bones on Jun 18, 2010 11:44:09 GMT
Screw Dizzee Rascal and James Corden. Here's the official unofficial England world cup anthem. Ladies & gents, Shuttleworth featuring Mark E. Smith - England's Heartbeat
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Post by marksamuels on Jun 18, 2010 16:05:36 GMT
Love it!
He's a big Arthur Machen fan is Mark E. Smith. It's true.
Mark S.
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Post by dem bones on Jun 18, 2010 19:21:59 GMT
much better now we've got the dreaded opening games behind us. Maradona's worked his black sorcery on Argentina. Chile deservedly beat a disgraceful France. Germany come unstuck against unfancied Serbia - and miss a penalty! USA are robbed after coming back from the dead. there you go. now if England can only make amends for that HIDEOUS first half performance, between us Shuttleworth-MES, Vault and some weird refereeing decisions will have saved the 2010 world cup!
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Post by Craig Herbertson on Jun 18, 2010 20:38:34 GMT
May I be the first to send my commiserations. What a dreadful performance by England. It looked at times as though they wore the wrong footwear. Best of luck against Slovenia.
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Post by marksamuels on Jun 18, 2010 21:19:01 GMT
May I be the first to send my commiserations. What a dreadful performance by England. It looked at times as though they wore the wrong footwear. Best of luck against Slovenia. Oh yes, it was pretty dire. But I'm sure we'll scrape past Slovenia. And then Mr Sexton Blake will be called into the squad for the 2nd round, I hope. I've heard reports that Richard Staines has assaulted his Algerian nurse in the retirement home, but as yet they're unconfirmed... Mark S.
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Post by dem bones on Jun 19, 2010 10:08:31 GMT
dear old Stainsy must have been incandescent after that piss poor performance. still, never mind. we could be france. i'm with you, mark. Capello will unleash revolutionary three pronged W. Rooney-S. Blake-M. E. Smith attack on the Slovenians and we'll turn them over by a two goal margin. USA will miss out after Diana Ross helicopters in to sky a last minute controversial penalty versus Algeria. Portugal will end one game playing with nine men and Australia - the miracle comeback starts today!
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Post by dem bones on Jun 21, 2010 8:13:07 GMT
Fabulously exciting end-to-end stuff in Saturday night's Cameroon-Denmark encounter. Arguably even more dramatic, New Zealand hanging on heroically for a well deserved point against Italy, perhaps the most exciting second half of the weird cup to date after USA-Slovenia. as far as the dark arts are concerned, i wasn't too wide of the mark in identifying Ivory Coast-Brazil as a potential bloodbath. a less lenient referee and the Ivorians would have ended the game two players light, although surprisingly they waited until they went three down to get nasty. Cheik Tiote's assault on Elano's shin is an early contender for foul of the tournament. equally praiseworthy, the contribution of Kader Keita who somehow escaped a a straight red for his studs up on Melo and whose impressive theatrics minutes later saw Kaka outrageously dismissed for a second yellow. The French team imploding, England unravelling .... this is so much more like it!
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Post by Craig Herbertson on Jun 21, 2010 15:57:53 GMT
I also liked the surrealism of sending Kakou off after he's been beaten to death for half the match and lifts his arm to prevent an opponent running into him
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Post by dem bones on Jun 22, 2010 13:59:29 GMT
Finest hour: souvenir match programme, England versus West Germany, World cup final 1966. Now the (much improved) second phase of matches are played out, we get a clearer picture of the glorious chaos. sadly, Portugal's annihilation of N. Korea (probably 'annihilation' isn't the best choice of word) should see them qualify regardless of their result versus Brazil so eagerly anticipated foul-fest is unlikely to materialise. France and England seem to have adopted a daring 'bore the fans rigid on the pitch, entertain the shit out of 'em off it" approach. it may yet backfire on both, although it's nicely set up for pantomime villain John Terry to bag the winner versus Slovenia - provided Fabio plays him. Uruguay-Mexico would be a mouthwatering prospect (remember the classic Argentina-Mexico encounter in 2006?) if either side needed a win, but they don't. Brazil and the supposedly maniacal Maradona's gang look the part, Holland have somehow acquired six points while playing only marginally better than England against Algeria (contender for worst game of this or any tournament) and Chile are quietly going about their business (when they're not going to ground like they've been smashed in the face with a house brick). Top displays of World Cup Africa to date? New Zealand hanging on for a deserved draw against the Italians, both sides in the Cameroon-Denmark mini classic, and *choke* USA for their magnificent comeback against Slovenia.
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