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Post by marksamuels on Apr 1, 2009 11:15:38 GMT
No Leyton Orient! (er, they didn't get the Leyton back til the 80's, and were still just Orient back then. Sorry to be a pedant.) This is the best thing that's been on here for ages. I have this nasty feeling that Mark is going to start looking out the window and see Staines staring back at him from across the road. with his library stamper set on kill... You really HAVE to 'edit' some Staines republishing now, old son... I know that he still calls Arsenal "Woolwich Arsenal" Mark S.
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Post by pulphack on Apr 1, 2009 11:52:52 GMT
Ah, that explains it. A traditionalist. He'd probably say (is he still with us or sadly departed?) that Newton Heath were currently heading Division One.
I'm surprised he didn't mention that dodgy little underage drinker who used to frequent his boozer, and probably has a complete collection (the only one apart from yours). Something Littlejohn, I think his name was...
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Post by mattofthespurs on Apr 1, 2009 13:17:30 GMT
No Leyton Orient! (er, they didn't get the Leyton back til the 80's, and were still just Orient back then. Sorry to be a pedant.) This is the best thing that's been on here for ages. I have this nasty feeling that Mark is going to start looking out the window and see Staines staring back at him from across the road. with his library stamper set on kill... You really HAVE to 'edit' some Staines republishing now, old son... All Spurs supporters still call em Woolwich Arsenal because that is where they are from and we wish they would all bugger off back over the river. I know that he still calls Arsenal "Woolwich Arsenal" Mark S.
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Post by H_P_Saucecraft on Apr 1, 2009 14:11:16 GMT
I think you're pulling our legs, Mark, but I'm enjoying it anyway Is Staines a parody of Shaun Hutson by any chance? (just for the record, I do like Hutson's work, before anyone thinks I'm having a go)
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Post by lobolover on Apr 1, 2009 18:48:37 GMT
I do think this be an early april fools joke. Come on, you do this to my thread, why didnt you start your own, Im trying to uncover some real trash in here
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Post by marksamuels on Apr 1, 2009 21:26:59 GMT
I do think this be an early april fools joke. Come on, you do this to my thread, why didnt you start your own, Im trying to uncover some real trash in here Lobo Sorry to have bothered your thread. Goodbye. Mark S.
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Post by allthingshorror on Apr 2, 2009 6:31:46 GMT
I do think this be an early april fools joke. Come on, you do this to my thread, why didnt you start your own, Im trying to uncover some real trash in here Lobo Sorry to have bothered your thread. Goodbye. Mark S. The quote 'cutting off your nose to spite your face' may suit here Lobo. Now you'll never know the truth....
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Post by Johnlprobert on Apr 2, 2009 8:00:16 GMT
Nevertheless my good friend Mr Samuels gets my vote for the funniest Vault postings in ages. I have loved every single one of these and I laughed my head off at the interview.
'Psycho Flasher' has been April 1st posted to all of my acquaintances as being my next book, with thanks to the kind individuals in a busy Bristol street who were willing to pose for the cover photo.
And of course it reminded me of my own excursion into true 'flash' fiction, which has caused much merriment amongst the secretarial typing pool at work, who thought any 10 year old writing something like that should have been sent to a psychiatrist. Fortunately I was sent to public school instead. And now everyone has to read about it.
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Post by David A. Riley on Apr 2, 2009 8:53:08 GMT
I loved that interview too.
Mark should dig out an obituary for Mr Staines (I'm sure he must have died by now - that photo shows a man who is surely heading for a fatal breakdown in his health in the not too distant future).
David
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Post by carolinec on Apr 2, 2009 11:10:40 GMT
Well, if Dick Staines doesn't really exist he certainly should do - he's clearly far better (and funnier) than Garth Marenghi!
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Post by Dr Terror on Apr 2, 2009 12:51:32 GMT
I have this nasty feeling that Mark is going to start looking out the window and see Staines staring back at him from across the road. with his library stamper set on kill... I think Mark is going to find himself transforming into Staines...
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Post by David A. Riley on Apr 2, 2009 13:09:11 GMT
If he hasn't already...
David
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Post by Dr Terror on Apr 2, 2009 13:21:42 GMT
Keep checking the WHC site to see whether Staines or Samuels shows up on the list of attending members!
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Post by David A. Riley on Apr 2, 2009 13:29:46 GMT
And if they do, will both ever be present at the same time.
Could be another case of Jekyll and Hyde, though who is Jekyll and who is Hyde is anyone's guess.
David
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chastel
Crab On The Rampage
Where wolf? There castle!
Posts: 42
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Post by chastel on Apr 3, 2009 18:14:34 GMT
Well, sometimes even great anthologies have had true manure among roses. Let´s say Joe R Lansdale have always impressed me . How bad his stories can be? Stephen King´s Granma and more than one story in Night shift sucked too, so to speak, but being a lady I am not saying what they sucked.
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