Guy N. Smith - Night Of The Crabs

[dem bones]

Guy N. Smith - Night Of The Crabs (Nel, July 1976)

The Welsh coast basks in summer tranquillity. Then the 'drownings' begin.

But not until the monstrous crustaceans crawl ashore, their pincers poised for destruction, does the world understand the threat it faces.

A seafood cocktail for the strongest stomachs

"What a beautiful night", Pat remarked ..... "If only we didn't have to worry about giant crabs!"

Holidaymaker Pat Benson, recently dumped and divorced, has only just met ace Marine Biologist Cliff Davenport when both their worlds are thrown into turmoil by the cow-sized crustaceans. Prof. Davenport has come to Shell Island off the Welsh Coast to investigate the disappearance of his nephew Ian and his fiancée Julie who went for a swim in the sea and never returned! After examining a trail of giant crab tracks in the sand he's arrested by the military police who accuse him of spying on their new pilot-less aircraft. Fortunately, he knows Sir Ronald Bradley at Whitehall, so he's let off with a warning and even given back his binoculars. But why were the army chaps so aggressive to begin with? Could they know more about the recent "mysterious disappearances" than they're letting on?

The answer is a resounding "No!"

Even though the enormous King Crab and his - by comparison - half-pint cronies have selected Shell Island as their on-land home, nobody who has seen them has lived to tell the tale and the army's surveillance equipment is obviously far from state of the art. Davenport suspects the truth and, together with Pat, keeps moonlight vigil at the spot where he saw the out-sized claw-prints. Their persistence is rewarded when they have the pleasure of watching the crabs scuttle after Bartholemew the mute beachcomber and tear him limb from limb!

Now that he's seen them in action, Davenport puts a call through to Grisedale at Whitehall and, explaining the urgency, beseeches him to send one of his top men. Grisedale goes him one better - he loans him drunken sot Colonel Goode whose brief involvement in the story at least ups the dialogue a notch. He is a super-arrogant, natural born sceptic who everybody hates on sight and the feeling is obviously mutual. Having decided "I could do with a drink. Whisky. I'm parched", he heads out for a night on the piss warning Davenport that he'll be driving back to London first thing in the morning. When more bathers go missing overnight, Goode, extra-grumpy now he's nursing a hangover, is less than sympathetic. "People want to learn to swim before they start buggering about in the water. Bring back Conscription, I say. Teach 'em all to swim!"

Meanwhile, the ease with which they've picked off and dismembered their victims has made the crab army so cocky that now they're ready to declare war on mankind. In the case of the evil genius King Crab there even seems to be something personal about it. He leads his creatures out of the sea and into a bloody first raid on the base where he masterminds an easy victory, with the soldiers scattered and a tank junked! Won't Colonel Goode feel silly when he reads about that in the newspaper!

It's great fun, of course. The pace picks up sharply once the crabs make themselves known, and the skirmishes with the army are glorious. Tense moments when Davenport puts on his frog-suit and locates the sleeping monsters to their cave, only to realise his escape is cut off by a sentry! Two big surprises: it's not especially violent and neither is there any gratuitous sex. There's a minor outbreak of premarital hot knee-trembler action on P. 49, but that's between the lead couple and after what they've been through who could begrudge Pat "feeling at his hardness through his trousers"?

Thanks, Jerrylad!

[dreadlocksmile]

Dreadlocksmile Review:

First published back in 1976, 'Night Of The Crabs' was the novel that really launched Guy N. Smith as a writer iconic pulp horror writer. Spawning four subsequent sequels and one insightful prequel, the movie production company Amicus later even bought the film rights to the 'Crabs' idea in 1976.

The tale begins when Professor Cliff Davenport, marine biologist and an all round stand-up guy, travels to a small piece of land known as Shell Island on the Welsh coast, to investigate the strange disappearance of his nephew Ian Wright and Wright’s fiancée Julie Coles. Alas, the love struck pair had their lives cut short during a romantic night-swimming escapade. A full scale search is put underway in an attempt to locate the missing pair, whilst Davenport begins his own investigations into their disappearance.

After being mistakenly arrested by the conveniently placed military, Davenport relays his suspicions to the leading figure and close personal friend of his - Sir Ronald Bradley of Whitehall. Davenport is subsequently released by the military and quickly meets up with Pat Benson, another guest at the hotel Davenport is currently lodging at. Benson informs Davenport of the mysterious markings left on the beach that she spotted during an early morning walk and together they begin a vigil on the surrounding beaches.

Not before long, Davenport and his Benson (who are now quickly becoming lovers) witness the savage death of the local deaf and dumb beachcomber known as Bartholomew, at the hands (or should I say claws) of gigantic crabs that have emerged from the waters of Shell Island.

Davenport reports these dramatic findings to the military via another one of Davenport’s impressively high ranking contacts – Grisedale of Whitehall, who sends the inept Colonel Goode to take over the ‘crab’ investigations. Of course, Goode is highly sceptical of the entire story and as such military action is postponed, until the crabs are actually upon the unprepared soldiers and local community.

An all out war ensues, with the monstrous crustaceans now swarming onto the helpless community of Shell Island. The military presence on Shell Island is almost completely annihilated by these seemingly indestructible freaks of nature.

The deadly epidemic is now a full blown reality, and reinforcements are sent in sharp-ish. The military fight back in an all-out battle at Barmouth. Alas, the heavy gauge weaponry of the tanks is still no match for the seemingly impenetrable armour of the crabs. Mankind needs to think fast if they are going to win the war against the crabs. Luckily they have Davenport on their side, whose quick thinking and truly inspired idea might just turn the tide in favour of a human victory...

The novel packs in as much blood spillage as possible, with an array of flamboyant characters each taking out their own independent (and often clichéd) roles within this outrageously over-the-top storyline.

From the outset, Smith delivers a truly original monstrous enemy for mankind to battle against, that due to the hate fuelled nature that Smith has given them, delivers a non-stop tirade of blood spilling action that will get pulp horror fans drooling from the very first attack.

Littered with elaborate twists and turns to the main thrust of the storyline, the tale ultimately concludes with an inspired yet bizarre grand finale. With such a far fetched idea tackled with an even more amusingly unlikely course of defence taken by the military, Smith has managed to produce nothing short of a masterpiece of seventies pulp horror.

The graphically depicted battle scenes between the crabs and the military deliver pages of edge-of-the-seat pulp horror entertainment that is interspersed with further crab carnage and comical character interaction. At no point does Smith take his foot off the accelerator from the very moment the crabs first take to the shore.

Not only are these gigantic enemies of mankind colossal in size and naturally armoured by their huge shells, they also display a surprising level of intelligence. Lead by a briefly glimpsed ‘King Crab’, these organised crustacean ranks pose a severe threat to the community.

`Night of the Crabs' was the first instalment in Guy's signature `Crabs' series, but should preferably be read after the later released prequel entitled 'The Origin Of The Crabs'. `Origin’ ends exactly where `Night’ takes off, bringing together a seamless and tight storyline to the crabs series as a whole.

The next crabs book in the series is `Killer Crabs' released just two years later. `Night' has set down the groundwork for this next outrageous pulp horror classic, where no time needs to be spent playing with the denial and disbelief of the military. From here on in its non-stop, blood soaked crab action. From the moment the crabs first take to the beach of Shell Island, expect nothing short of one onslaught after another.

‘Night of the Crabs’ is the true beginning of the all-out crab war. It’s a classic pulp horror and splatterpunk novel that is hard to be bettered for such an unashamed far-fetched enemy. An enjoyable read is the understatement of the century!

The book runs for a total of 144 pages (pretty standard length for one of Guy's novels). Like with the majority of Smith's other novels, an abundance of action and twists to the storyline are somehow crammed into these few pages.

[holger]

I purchased the recently published limited edition hardcover edition of NIGHT OF THE CRABS (signed by GNS) and sat down to read it last night. Though I have previously read a number of GNS novels I had never before read anything from the Crabs series, but had heard so much about it. Now that I have read it I can safely say this is probably my favourite Smith novel to date. Unputdownable.

BTW maybe someone can help, but I was told that - apparently - someone who was not GNS had penned additional scenes for the hardcover edition. Nothing of that is mentioned in the book or any promotional material I received. Is there any truth in it? And if there is, what was added?

[allthingshorror]

As far as I am aware the prologue was penned by Neil Jackson, the epilogue comes from another Crabs book and if memory serves there may be a new chapter that Neil wrote, but Guy re-wrote.

Hope that helps,

Johnny.

[antmusic]

I thought that NJ was only penning the new Crabs book (status unknown)... Go figure with a publishing company called Ghostwriter Publications... hahaha.

[erebus]

Could possibly be the quickest paced book ever this. Case point being the crabs are still very much at large in chapter 13 the penultimate chapter of the book. Our hero Cliff Davenport buys a local newspaper just for the hell of it and gets some inspiration.
Chapter 14 six or so pages later and the crabs are vanquished and he's off to marry his new bird, Who I might add he met about five days previous which adds to my statement.
Classic. Only GNS could get away with this.

[kooshmeister]

Just got my copy of this in the mail the other day. Will start on it as soon as I'm done with Origin.

[killercrab]

My favourite because it was the first. Visited Barmouth where it was based a couple of years back. The crabs are BIG.

KC

[bobdirehack]

A classic of the genre, Guy N. Smith's Night of the Crabs came out exactly at the right time when the world was hungry for stories about giant telepathic mutant crabs.  Smith's rampaging crabs have chased soldiers, big game hunters, nymphomaniacs and even Scotsmen through eight novels and a book of short stories.  It's also the only book of it's kind (that I know of) which comes with it's own mascot.  And so, on the 43rd anniversary of it's publication, I'd like to present a chapter-by-chapter summary.  Beginning with...

No, wait...

No, not that one either.  Ah! Here we go.  Chapter 1 -

[bobdirehack]

Chapter 1

Ian and Julie are lab assistants who work for Ian's swingin' uncle Cliff. On the last day of their vacation in Wales they visit beautiful Shell Island - half top secret aircraft base - half golden beach paradise.

They go swimming and are eaten by giant crabs.

Meanwhile, swingin' uncle Cliff Davenport - marine botanist, widower and Sherlock Holmes impersonator, is lounging around his lab, daydreaming about Ian and Julie boinking. Two police officers arrive and tell him the two are missing. Swingin' uncle Cliff has bad feels about it.

[bobdirehack]

Chapter 2

After moping around for five days Cliff packs a bag and heads out to Llanbedr, the Welsh Cabo San Lucas. He checks in at a boarding house run by the Widow Jones, questions her about his nephew, grimly drinks tea and gets all premonitory.

Later he checks in with the local constable and, after a snippy exchange, leaves.

Next day, Cliff walks over the south end of Shell Island and...wait a minute. If you can drive or walk to Shell Island, how is it an island? Shouldn't it be Shell Peninsula?

Anyway, it's only two miles to the place his lab assistants took their last swim. On the beach he finds giant crab tracks in the sand just as the tide is about to erase them.

Thinking the airplanes might have made the tracks because reasons, he goes to spy on the super-secret airbase and is immediately caught. They toss him in the brig.

[bobdirehack]

Chapter 3 -

Cliff sits in a dark cell, tortured by the ticking of his watch. Should have bought a digital. Eventually guards drag him into Donald Pleasance's office.

Donald's name is Meyerscough because of course it it. Cliff tells them his story, leaving out the giant crabs part. They don't believe him anyway. Fortunately Cliff knows someone in the aristocracy, Sir Ronald Bradley of Whitehall. They call Sir Ronny, he vouches for Cliff and they cut him loose.

Back at the boarding house Cliff is thrown together with the recent divorcee Pat Benson, described in the classic soft-core porn novel style. (hair color, cup size, age)

He immediately spills everything. (Swingin' Uncle Cliff has no filter.) She says she's seen the crab marks. They are both amazed. Pat offers to team up Scooby-Doo style.

The next day, Cliff reads a newspaper article about five other disappearances.

Clearly, they are not.

[bobdirehack]

Chapter 4

Disguised as tourists, Cliff & Patt walk hand in hand to the beach. No one will see through their clever ruse!

They find more tracks and deduce that the sheep-sized crabs come out at night to feed, particularly on the full moon. Maybe it's a village full of were-crabs? Ever think of that, Prof. Smarty-Pants?

They plan to stake out the beach hoping to see the crabs and Cliff is all "this is no job for a woman" and Pat is all "I'm going anyway" and Cliff is all "okay but I'm in charge because penis."

They see a hobo.



They almost boink but go back to the rooming house instead. Mrs. Jones explains the hobo is Bartholomew the Beachcomber and he's more-or-less harmless despite the alliteration. They argue a bit and go have a nap.

At 11 they walk the two miles back to the beach and engage in some cliches.

[bobdirehack]

Chapter 5

They boink.

*facepalm*

They see Bart shamble past. Then the giant crabs arrive. (Finally!)

They're cow-sized with evil faces. Then their leader King Crab! arrives. The very personification of evil!

They march around a bit. Then they eat Bart.

[bobdirehack]

Chapter 6

Later that same scene...

The crabs retreat back into the ocean. Cliff & Pat discuss what they're going to do. Pat is hysterical because girl parts. They go back to the boarding house and and talk about what they're going to do.



The next morning Cliff calls "Grisedale", apparently someone with the authority to order military personnel because he sends a Colonel Goode to check out Cliff's story.

Turns out Grisedale is 'Commander' Grisedale of the Ministry. Gosh.

Colonel Goode arrives, gets drunk, goes to sleep, gets up next morning and leaves. Cliff might as well have called the Boy's Brigade.