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Post by dem bones on Jan 10, 2009 10:31:01 GMT
Mentioned them at the old place, but Romance By You have since expanded their repertoire to include a Western and a Pirate adventure among others: Enjoy the adventure of starring in your own personalized romance novel!
A unique and romantic gift. Medieval Passion, Tropical Treasure, Love's Next Door, Pirates of Desire, Vampire Kisses, and now our most recent release, Western Rendezvous, are love stories full of romance, passion and humor.
You co-author your 160 to 180-page novel by providing the names, features and places that personalize your book. There are over 26 characteristics to personalize - you can even include your dog or cat! A personalized cover adds that finishing touch.
Follow your heart and give the gift of romance... a gift that will be treasured forever. This is a sample from Vampire Kisses ... A college campus is the setting for Vampire Kisses and where the Bride and demonik first cross paths. It’s love at first sight, but as they become closer, the Bride discovers that demonik has a horrifying secret - he’s a vampire doomed to a bloodthirsty immortality!
Although the Bride senses danger beneath his soft-spoken manner, and even after demonik himself warns her away, the Bride is drawn to this creature of the night and loves him as she has loved no other. How spookily true to life can you get! Now if only they'd expand the operation to include a 'When Animals Attack!' outing, A Richard Allen rip-off and a steamy Penny Black romp ..... |
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Post by carolinec on Jan 10, 2009 19:37:22 GMT
This is a sample from Vampire Kisses ... A college campus is the setting for Vampire Kisses and where the Bride and demonik first cross paths. It’s love at first sight, but as they become closer, the Bride discovers that demonik has a horrifying secret - he’s a vampire doomed to a bloodthirsty immortality!
Although the Bride senses danger beneath his soft-spoken manner, and even after demonik himself warns her away, the Bride is drawn to this creature of the night and loves him as she has loved no other. How spookily true to life can you get! Aw, Dem, that's sooooooooooo romantic - doing a book like that for your lady love. I wish my hubby would do something romantic like that!  Anyway, now your cover's well and truly blown. We now know that you're not the hard drinking, hard living, hard loving, macho man you pretend to be - you're just a soppy old romantic at heart!   |
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Post by dem bones on Jan 10, 2009 20:20:12 GMT
Huh! And i had some hot my arm news for you too (including the lowdown on what the nurse calls "the knobbly bits"(, but i'm not sure you deserve a special treat after that scurrilous post. Anyway, here's another sample, this time in a Wild West setting: In the 1800s, Caroline C. is the savvy, stunning saloon owner who, on the advice of her best friend Troo, dares to give love one more chance. When the stranger rides into town on the rails of the new railroad, his smile steals our heroine's heart - but his holster is loaded with a secret that could blast away her livelihood!
Can Caroline trust a man who may ultimately destroy her? Will the hairy stranger choose business or pleasure before his secret is revealed? Saddle up for love, passion and humor!
Caroline and the stranger meet and the tension begins!
Caroline had to admit he was a rather attractive man, neatly attired in denim and leather. She scanned his athletic frame and stopped at an arresting pair of blue eyes peeking out beneath a rather large cowboy hat, set atop straggly hair. The stranger approached the bar, wearing a smoldering smile across a handsomely rugged jaw.
"What can I do for you?" she said coolly.
"What's your specialty," he flirted, leaning against the bar, flashing his big blues.
"Sarcasm," was the sharp reply. "Care for a double?" Caroline had spent the morning cleaning the saloon's eaves troughs and was feeling filthy, embarrassed and annoyed all at the same time. She was in no mood for flirtation.
Put in his place, Ian cleared his throat and introduced himself as Ian Anderson, a one-legged, cod-piece wearing flute player with hot pop group Jethro Tull. "Ma'am, just call me Ian ," he said, trying to make amends.
"Well the guy you're looking for? The hotel manager? That's me. I'm also the owner, Caroline C.," she said coolly, giving a little and extending her hand ..... |
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Post by carolinec on Jan 11, 2009 11:48:52 GMT
 Oh, Dem, you've just made my day with that! If I'm really, really good, can I have the 2nd instalment some time ... please? Oh, and I have said before, I'd love to hear more about your arm - especially the knobbly bits (think I'd probably prefer to hear more about my encounter with Ian Anderson though )
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Post by dem bones on Jan 11, 2009 12:30:50 GMT
Ok. An ever so slightly modified version of an extract from the nautical but nice Pirates of Desire .....
In Pirates of Desire, the promise of pirate lore kindles the dreams of our strong-willed heroine, Lady Caroline, as she and her best friend Troo scheme for high seas adventure.
But being captured by the notorious pirate captain, Ian Anderson, is as fiery and unforgiving as the seas themselves. Anderson, also known as 'Sea Wolf', is a handsome rogue and Lady Caz ultimately loses her heart to this rugged pirate.
Chapter Five: Caz & Ian - "Is that a really really long flute in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?".
. . . Caz slapped the coin from his outstretched hand, sending it flying into the shrubbery. “We don’t want your blood money!”
Ian sighed, his eyes narrowing, then he suddenly reached out and grabbed Caz by her bodice string that, unbeknownst to her, had conveniently become untied and hung loosely from her dress. The lace tightened immediately as he pulled her towards him like a dog on a tether. Caz winced with surprise and embarrassment, her blue eyes ablaze.
He leaned close to her, breathing softly in her ear, making Caz almost lose her balance and certainly some sense. He paused just long enough to catch her off guard in anticipation, when he said, “You might want to keep the girls tied up, Mr. Jeffrey Hammond-Hammond” and he tightened the lace and tied a knot.
Her face flushed and she slapped him hard on the cheek. Ian grabbed her by her dark brown hair and planted a kiss on her lips, long and sensual. When he released his grip, she was reeling, wild eyed as a scurvy dog.
“Take them away!” he ordered sinister fretboard maestro Mr. Barre with a wave of his hand. "I'll deal with her after I've changed into by best, most tightest silver cod-piece, looked over my estate, tilled the soil, fed the cat and knocked off a few new tracks for the next Tull album."
The buccaneer escorts grabbed the women’s wrists and roughly pulled them towards the path. Caz turned her head and caught the captain’s eye.
“Now I know why they call you Sea Wolf. I think you are despicable!” she yelled at the top of her lungs. She quickly turned to Troo, a look of terror in her eyes as they were dragged down the pathway.
Ian smiled, as he heard his crew laughing from afar; and hopped away on his good leg whistling a medley of Thick As A Brick's best bits: this was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. If circumstances were different, he would have asked her to join him. But he hadn’t even found out her name…
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Post by carolinec on Jan 11, 2009 16:30:52 GMT
You're too good to me, Dem. I don't think I can take any more (not without getting a hernia from laughing so much anyway! ) Now, when do we get to see those pictures of your "knobbly bits" (your arm, that is) ..? 
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Post by carolinec on Jan 12, 2009 12:47:48 GMT
Oh dear, you know what you've done to me now, Dem, don't you? All this thinking about Ian Anderson led me to check out the Tull website - and he's doing a solo concert in London in May! I might just have to try to get to that. Not sure if I'll be fit enough, but I reckon I'm going to have to try ... (BTW for any Tull fans in Germany, etc, they're touring in Europe from March onwards) |
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Post by Craig Herbertson on Jan 12, 2009 14:25:48 GMT
Dem, you're just a bit too good at this... I have my suspicions. I once wrote a story for Jackie (I was desperate for the rent money) The rejection slip came back:
not original enough, too cliched.
I'd spent ages on it, trying to get enough cliches and stereotypes and was thoroughly pissed off.
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Post by carolinec on Jan 12, 2009 16:01:47 GMT
Dem, you're just a bit too good at this... I have my suspicions. I once wrote a story for Jackie (I was desperate for the rent money) The rejection slip came back: not original enough, too cliched.I'd spent ages on it, trying to get enough cliches and stereotypes and was thoroughly pissed off. Too true, he is! I love your story about trying to get published in Jackie, Craig - did you use a female pseudonym? I was never much of a Jackie reader (in case you hadn't already guessed  ), but I always thought you had to write non-stop cliches and stereotyping in order to get in there too! Not sure if I'll be fit enough, but I reckon I'm going to have to try ... BTW - just to clarify - I meant "not sure if I'll be fit enough to travel", not "not sure if I'll be fit enough for all that bodice-ripping". I'm afraid my bodice-ripping days are long gone ...  |
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Post by Craig Herbertson on Jan 12, 2009 19:21:30 GMT
trying to get published in Jackie, Craig - did you use a female pseudonym Actually this might sound a bit nasty but I picked the name of a friend of mine from school - a bloke who was always a bit macho. The intention was to confront him in the pub while surrounded by muscle-bound thugs and say 'I didn't know you wrote for Jackie?' This grandiose plan suffered a bit when I found out I wasn't good enough. |
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Post by carolinec on Jan 12, 2009 19:34:04 GMT
Actually this might sound a bit nasty but I picked the name of a friend of mine from school - a bloke who was always a bit macho. The intention was to confront him in the pub while surrounded by muscle-bound thugs and say 'I didn't know you wrote for Jackie?' I love it! |
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Post by dem bones on Jan 13, 2009 10:17:43 GMT
Ok after galleons and galleons of old spicy fun we reach the steamy climax of Pirates Of Desire ....
Avast Behind! Love triumphs for Lady Caroline & Ian 'Sea Wolf' Anderson
They stared at each other for a long while, their eyes saying the words they dared not speak. The air was thick with the potent energy of lovers discovering each other for the first time. Without breaking contact, Ian leaned back on his pillows and held out a strong hand, grabbed a passing mandolin and gave Caz an impromptu acoustic performance of the entire Jethro Tull boxed set before welcoming her to his wobbling water-bed.
As if in a waking dream, Caz took his hand and stood beside the bed, her blue eyes never leaving his. Squeezing his hand gently, she let it fall and slowly started to remove her chemise, her body swaying with the sea as it fell away, feeling the cool sea breeze seductively kiss her skin while Ian absent-mindedly polished his bongos.
His heart seemed to beat outside his body as Ian watched her undress in the moonlight. As each piece of cloth fell and he drank in more of her curvaceous, womanly form, he wondered if a man could ever tire of such a sight. Languidly, she stood beside his bed, fully exposed and vulnerable, but with a quiet strength that caused Ian to hold his breath until he went boss eyed.
Slowly and gracefully, she climbed onto his bed, running her hands across his naked chest, relishing the feel of his muscular form beneath her fingers. Pressing her industrial strength autograph book into his . . . Much as i never tire of reading about how great i am, i'm afraid the credit for Pirates Of Desire, etc belongs to Romance By You 'cause they do all the work. All you have to do is click on a book cover/ preview/ fill in the blanks, copy the results and edit as you see fit. If you want, you can buy the book, although i'm not sure you get a chance to proof-read it first. It's such a brilliant, trashy idea i'm surprised nobody's thought of it before (?). I hope they eventually expand their repertoire to include horror, supernatural, s & m - the possibilities are endless really. Hey Craig - if Jackie is anything like Misty or Bunty you'd have been doing your unfriend a favour. The Bride recently acquired another Misty annual and the standard is as fantastic as ever - and this one has three or four short ghost stories as a bonus. Not read them yet, but the Bride (a big fan of Chris Priestly's Uncle Montague's Tales of Terror tells me i must get around to "the one about the evil gnome" ....
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Post by carolinec on Jan 13, 2009 10:24:13 GMT
Pressing her industrial strength autograph book into his . . . . How did you know I'd only have one thought in mind - to get his autograph?!  BTW I see I've changed my name again - it's Caroline, not Catherine!!!  They are brilliant, though, no matter who writes them. I'm going to take a closer look at this - such fun. Cheers, Dem! |
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Post by Craig Herbertson on Jan 13, 2009 11:15:57 GMT
Dem
Jackie's standards were obviously higher than mine. I even wrote some fake readers letters to try and get a tenner from them somehow and failed to get published on the letters page (I was really broke at the time). I just don't have it as far as Jackie goes.
However I still read the Beano and Oor Wullie if you want to gauge the immensity of my intellect
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Post by carolinec on Jan 13, 2009 20:04:30 GMT
BTW I see I've changed my name again - it's Caroline, not Catherine!!! And now my comment above looks silly - as you've secretly corrected it without telling anybody! Anyway, I was thinking about this ... if the people who do these DIY books haven't yet done a horror one, there's a market here for somebody to provide a template for them. What they need, I'd say, is someone who can write horror with a sense of humour - and I reckon there are a few people who fit that bill hanging around the Vault! Go on, do that query letter ... LATER EDIT: I've just taken a look at their website and they do a "MysteryByYou" one as well - looks like it's just been launched: www.bookbyyou.com/mystery/ |
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), but I always thought you had to write non-stop cliches and stereotyping in order to get in there too!
