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Post by dem bones on Jan 9, 2020 14:37:56 GMT
This looks a bit great; Frank Lambirth - Behind The Door (Popular Library, 1988) Blurb: Drive carefully on those remote mountain roads. Because you don't want an accident that can put you Inside Skystone Hospital.
Where ambulances pull In, but not out. Where the greedy, the lustful, the violent run the wards just like they run the rest of the world. Only with more pain. And a lot more terror. Where no one ever leaves sane. Or alive. Or in one, unbloodied piece.
BEHIND THE DOOR The very first step is fatal . . .And inside: Prologue. With her husband away on business, Madeleine Turner has driven down to ready their newly acquired home, the old Terlin place in Stoneville, Beauregard County. A nosey stranger, on learning that she's alone, promptly murders her, dumps her corpse in the dam. A party of four are involved in a near fatal accident when their car drives into a ditch after some fool removed a warning sign. With the eldest, Gavin Thorne, on the verge of a heart attack, police and ambulance realise there's nothing for it but to drive him to the nearest hospital, Skystone, a maximum security private sanitarium in the Ozarks for the extremely rich. After a terse exchange over the telephone, the four are duly delivered to Dr. Mainwaring and his ghastly crew. Gavin Thorne aside, they're at no risk of loss of life from their injuries, though the blurb suggests the Skystone team will soon put that right. Elizabeth Shea, Thorne's secretary, has escaped with a few bruises, but the unctuous Mainwaring is fearful she may be concussed. Nurse, kindly give her a shot of something to sedate her. Scott Sutherlin, a horror movie producer (I think), has a broken arm. Meredith, Thorne's flighty young daughter, was pretty much coked out of her skull at time of impact so no telling where her head is at just now. That night Elizabeth hears sounds of a struggle in the corridor - a woman is being sexually assaulted! Tip-toeing groggily to the rescue, she walks in on the very beautiful, predatory lesbian Shane Covington giving a fellow nurse a right seeing to. The following day Sergeant Cobb Kendall pays a second visit to Skystone, this time to inquire into the whereabouts of the ambulance and it's two-man crew. Nothing has been seen or heard of them since last night's slight altercation with the more volatile members of the hospital staff. To be ... etc
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Post by Jojo Lapin X on Jan 9, 2020 15:31:11 GMT
I never do this kind of thing, but this reminds me of something that has haunted me for decades, perhaps even since the late 70s. At some point I held in my hand a book, most likely an American paperback original, that was about a sane person wrongfully held at a mental hospital where nasty things were going on. I remember the back cover saying something about the protagonist watching somebody being buried in the back yard at night. What book is this? And to forestall any inappropriate attempts at hilarity, I am pretty sure it was not "A Woman Seldom Found."
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Post by andydecker on Jan 9, 2020 17:31:59 GMT
How could they put a stamp on this? Vandals!
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Post by helrunar on Jan 9, 2020 18:06:27 GMT
The blurb makes me think of Horror Hospital, an early Seventies gem that I only saw a couple of years ago for the first time, but has become one of my favorite films of the era. Robin Askwith plays a grubby, depressed would-be rock star who is craftily directed by scheming homosexual Dennis Price (ALWAYS a delight) to take a "holiday" at the insane asylum headed by evil, mad Michael Gough, his insidious accomplice Ellen Pollock, and the marvelous Skip Martin. Vanessa Shaw appears in the ingenue/dollybird role.
Looking forward to more of your witty remarks about the story, Kev! I'm sure your writing is much more entertaining than the original.
Steve
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Post by Swampirella on Jan 9, 2020 19:56:41 GMT
How could they put a stamp on this? Vandals! Canadian vandals too, I'm ashamed to say, since I've discovered "Esquimalt" is on Vancouver Island in British Columbia
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Post by cauldronbrewer on Jan 9, 2020 22:22:53 GMT
And to forestall any inappropriate attempts at hilarity, I am pretty sure it was not "A Woman Seldom Found. But could this be a distorted recollection of “When Darkness Loves Us?”
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Post by dem bones on Jan 10, 2020 8:01:34 GMT
Elizabeth is informed by scary Dr. Caudill that alas, Mr. Thorne passed away during the night. When she tittle tattles about what she saw last night he angrily dismisses her account as "drug induced fantasies" she would do well to keep to herself. Undeterred, she confides in matronly Mrs Eddy, senior nurse, who, while sympathetic to a point, agrees with the perma-gruff Caudill's assessment. Much to Elizabeth's horror, Mrs Eddy summons the nurses in question, and insists she repeat her allegations to their faces. Molly Hatcher, trainee, is mortified as Elizabeth, but brazen, sloe-eyed Shane, finds it all very amusing.
For no immediately discernible reason, a flashback to Elizabeth's, ah, sexual awakening - she was molested by a randy gardener after she and her sister caught him rogering a maid. This is followed by a detailed account of the recent infidelity with next-door-neighbour's stud toy-boy, which brought a close to her six-year marriage to nice-but-frigid Ted. When Elizabeth snaps out of her reverie it is to find kindly Dr. Mainwaring leaning over her with hypodermic poised. Just a little something to make those nasty hallucinations go away, dear, nothing to worry about. In fact, it's his specially patented 'truth serum.' What with her outrageous fantasies of lesbian nurse orgies, it is imperative that he establish the extent of her lunacy.
Elizabeth receives a visit from ancient patient Carrie Dalton, come to deliver them both from the Hell on earth that is Skystone. Johnny, a manically cheerful orderly, arrives just in time to prevent Carrie burning down the ward.
Fair do's to Mr. Lambirth, he seems keen to give us our money's worth.
* Correction. Scott Sutherin was the late Mr. Thorne's PA and bodyguard, and not, as stated in initial post, some "horror movie producer." That was one of his jokes.
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Post by Jojo Lapin X on Jan 10, 2020 16:09:33 GMT
And to forestall any inappropriate attempts at hilarity, I am pretty sure it was not "A Woman Seldom Found. But could this be a distorted recollection of “When Darkness Loves Us?” There is a proper time and place for facetiousness. This is not it.
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Post by helrunar on Jan 10, 2020 17:52:57 GMT
I'd never heard of "When Darkness Loves Us." It gets impressive marks on the "Good Reads" site. One reader's ecstatic review began thus:
Reading horror paperbacks from the 80s is like buying drugs off the street. You wind up with so many bags of oregano that you lose hope, and then, suddenly, you’re clutching the real deal and the top of your head is lifting off and you can’t remember your name, your address, or whether you’re biologically human.
That sounds distinctly reminiscent of certain moments in "the Vault experience."
H.
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Post by Jojo Lapin X on Jan 11, 2020 22:45:57 GMT
I never do this kind of thing, but this reminds me of something that has haunted me for decades, perhaps even since the late 70s. At some point I held in my hand a book, most likely an American paperback original, that was about a sane person wrongfully held at a mental hospital where nasty things were going on. I remember the back cover saying something about the protagonist watching somebody being buried in the back yard at night. What book is this? And to forestall any inappropriate attempts at hilarity, I am pretty sure it was not "A Woman Seldom Found." Come on, people! This is the kind of stuff you read. You have 24 hours before I become irate.
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Post by dem bones on Jan 14, 2020 9:58:24 GMT
I never do this kind of thing, but this reminds me of something that has haunted me for decades, perhaps even since the late 70s. At some point I held in my hand a book, most likely an American paperback original, that was about a sane person wrongfully held at a mental hospital where nasty things were going on. I remember the back cover saying something about the protagonist watching somebody being buried in the back yard at night. What book is this? And to forestall any inappropriate attempts at hilarity, I am pretty sure it was not "A Woman Seldom Found." Come on, people! This is the kind of stuff you read. You have 24 hours before I become irate. Sorry, it has me beat. For a while I thought it might even be Behind The Door, but recent developments have put paid to that. I hope someone cracks it. Will continue to wrack shrunken "brain." Meanwhile; The lunatics have taken over the asylum. When Elizabeth awakens from her latest drugged sleep, she sets off along the corridor in search of the kitchen. Much to her alarm, she finds the Hospital deserted! The medication room has been ransacked, the vending machines broken open and looted for cigarettes and confectionery. Evidence of a fire confirms Carrie the pyromaniac is a tenacious old goat. A muffled cry from within a morgue drawer. An apprehensive Elizabeth slides it open to find a bound, gagged Scott Sutherlin stuffed inside! Scott and Elizabeth prowl the grounds, seeking a way out. It's hopeless. The one gate is kept locked and Skystone is surrounded by a tall electrified fence. They arrive at a second, dilapidated hospital tucked behind the modern building. We later learn that this is home to those who, "If they were adjudged sane, would be tried for capital crimes" - in other words, the homicidal maniacs listed in the "Who waits behind the door?" panel [see initial post]. The two buildings are connected by a huge steel door painted red. Scott and Elizabeth discover the missing ambulance concealed behind trees, the broken bodies of the two medics propped in their seats. "The one called Otis was beaten until he was like pulp. God, he doesn't have a face any more." The staff live on-site in the old Albritton mansion. Or at least they did. Exploring the premises, Scott chances upon first one butchered body, then another ... twenty-plus in all, strewn around the building. Some shot, most stabbed, one with a baseball bat ... let's not go into that. In the adjoining garage, the rotting corpses of the missing patients stacked in a mouldering pile. In the garden of the new building, an elderly couple Elizabeth first took for sunbathing invalids .... Frozen and hungry, the defeated pair return to the main building to telephone for help. The lines have been cut. Rifling Caudill's papers, Scott makes a discovery so hideous, so alarming, he barely dare share it. "Elizabeth, we're in an insane asylum." Stunned, she looked at him, shaking her head, begging. "No Scott. Oh please, no. It can't be."But it is. He produces a brochure to prove it. Persuading Elizabeth to stay in her room, Scott sets off in search of his beloved Meredith. He's been gone an awful long time. I neither know nor care if this is a "good" novel. Let's just say that, If you are in this for sadistic murder (albeit off-page; we mostly get to arrive after the event), Satanic flagellation, human sacrifice, orgies, and bogus, looney tunes medics, you've come to the right place. TBC.
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Post by Jojo Lapin X on Jan 14, 2020 13:19:02 GMT
Thanks for trying! Nonetheless, I am now irate.
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Post by Shrink Proof on Jan 14, 2020 13:23:36 GMT
Let's just say that, If you are in this for sadistic murder (albeit off-page; we mostly get to arrive after the event), Satanic flagellation, human sacrifice, orgies, and bogus, looney tunes medics, you've come to the right place. Reminds me of some NHS facilities where I've worked....
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Post by dem bones on Jan 15, 2020 12:45:54 GMT
Only two weeks into the year and already the strongest contender for personal favourite novel read in 2020. Appropriately enough, Behind The Door twists and turns like crazy, and you put your trust in this or that ostensibly 'sane' character at your own risk. Not quite as sleazy as perhaps anticipated - as mentioned, much of the bloodshed is perpetuated off page; we just get to tread in the squishy, flyblown corpses - though it has its moments. The Bad Sex interludes are a joy, as is the final reveal.
A very Vault horror novel, if you get my drift.
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Post by helrunar on Jan 15, 2020 15:59:04 GMT
From a review posted to an online retail sales site:
If this novel were written today, it would be twice as long and twice as exploitive, as it is, Frank Lambirth keeps "Behind The Door" relatively short so that this slab of fast-paced, eighties exploitation, briskly moving through brutal murder, lesbian sexcapades, drug trips, rape, bondage, whippings, arson, car wrecks, police corruption, a helicopter assault on Skystone, people being shoved in corpse bins, Satanic black masses (with sex), and more bad and unprofessional behavior that a razor wielding lesbian nurse can shake her weapon at.
Clearly, it's fun for the whole family.
H.
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