Harvard Lampoon - Nightlight: A Parody

[dem bones]

The Harvard Lampoon - Nightlight: A Parody (Constable, November, 2009)

"When you, like, live forever, what's there to live for?

JoeRoberts.co.uk

Blurb:

About three things I was absolutely certain. First, Edwart was most likely my soul mate, maybe. Second, there was a vampire part of him—which I assumed was wildly out of his control—that wanted me dead. And third, I unconditionally, irrevocably, impenetrably, heterogeneously, gynecologically, and disreputably wished he had kissed me.

And thus Belle Goose falls in love with the mysterious and sparkly Edwart Mullen in the Harvard Lampoon's hilarious send-up of Twilight.

Pale and klutzy, Belle arrives in Switchblade, Oregon looking for adventure, or at least an undead classmate. She soon discovers Edwart, a super-hot computer nerd with zero interest in girls. After witnessing a number of strange events — Edwart leaves his tater tots untouched at lunch! Edwart saves her from a flying snowball! — Belle has a dramatic revelation: Edwart is a vampire. But how can she convince Edwart to bite her and transform her into his eternal bride, especially when he seems to find girls so repulsive?

Complete with romance, danger, insufficient parental guardianship, creepy stalker-like behavior, and a vampire prom, Nightlight is the uproarious tale of a vampire-obsessed girl, looking for love in all the wrong places.

Doubtless acting on my suggestion that they flood the High Street bookshops with even more Vampire & Paranormal Romance so we - ok, i - can have another good chortle at more "they're destroying my beloved genre!" histrionics, Those-lovely-people-at-Robinsons (Constable chapter) are unleashing this early next month. Guess some attempt at a "review" is called for, and at 154 pages of large-ish print, it shouldn't prove too hard to tackle, but the spectre of the tragically unhilarious Bored Of The Rings looms large - and why do they have to include that "A Parody" in the title? Besides, i wanna check with my new friends on the Para-Romance scene first to see if i like it or not. One thing though; it says much about just how massive Twilight has become that these jesters would even bother to parody it.

[franklinmarsh]

Nice one! This should appeal to both sets - the fans will buy it for completeism, the naysayers 'cos it takes the piss. Of course, it'll probably appeal to neither.
I did enjoy Bored (mainly because I found Lord such a chore and anything that ribbed it was welcome - and there was some genuine humour in it) but Doon didn't work. I hadn't read Dune and don't know how much difference that would make. I've a knackered copy of the Bond parody Alligator somewhere - not so much a spoof, as a nose-thumbing at Ian Fleming's writing style.
I'm so glad they did this, though I don't know why.
There was a resurgence of the lampoon novel a while back, with Barry Trotter trashing Harry Potter.
And I assume they have to put the word 'parody' in, in case some compensation culture hawk picks it up thinking it actually is Twilight, and sues them for zillions for trauma caused by stupidity

[dem bones]

yeah, i'm sure it helps if you really love or even hate the books their taking the piss out of. i had a test-dip into Nightlight. It's not exactly ... uh ... biting (sorry), but i covered about thirty pages before i even realised it, so will likely slot it in at some point. i'd be interested to get some opinions on the HL's from some of our US readers as i'm thinking, just like ours, the humour doesn't always travel so well.

Did you find your copy of Anne Billson's Bloodsuckers? must say, i got plenty of genuine laughs from that and am now looking to track down her ghost novel, Stiff Lips (do the spectres of horrible prog-rock band the Drunken Boats haunt a Notting Hill flat?). Bloodsuckers is far more pure vampire horror novel than the Yuppie satire it's so often portrayed as. Apparently Salmen Rushdie called it that in an early review and it stuck.

[franklinmarsh]

Not yet. Must get up in that loft (to see if I've one of the old Signet Bond paperbacks to show how accurate the Alligator cover was, front and back)

I've not read Stiff Lips, but remember my brother and his wife raving about it

[dem bones]

imagine, you being related to people of taste ...

i reckon you'll enjoy Anne Billson. Suckers is a terrif London horror novel and i can't think of a less sympathetic heroine than Dora, not ever, but she's great. Billson probably imagined the Bar Nouveau as the worst the gastro pub nightmare could ever get, but she couldn't see the smoking ban looming on the horizon and at least they have T. Rex (Jeepster) and Roxy (All I Want Is You) on the jukebox before some vampire yuppie bastard gives it a bit of suicide pop (Kim Wilde's A View From A Bridge, i think.) But i digress.

Morton Cooper - The Munsters (Avon, 1964)

A Monster-ously Funny Original Novel Based On The Sensationally Successful Spook-tacular TV Series.

Blurb:
The Munsters live in a great big haunted house — in fact they haunt it. They are like any family you might know, except that Pop is Frankenstein's Monster in a kindly mood; Grandpa, the Count, is a semi-retired vampire; Mama is ghoulishly gorgeous and Eddie-boy likes to to perch in a corner of the ceiling with his pet-vulture. And then there is niece Marilyn. She's — ugh — ­beautiful! Ugh — normal!

Read the book and rock with laughter. Watch THE MUNSTERS every Thursday night on CBS Television.

i guess this one qualifies as "satire", whatever that is. turned up a copy yesterday in a condition that can only be described as "soiled" and i don't even want to speculate as to what those stains on the cover are all about. Grief, but there are some serious perves out there.